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How to brake the news

So I just started my paperwork today for my divorce. My whole family knows about but My husbands does not. He doesnt want to tell them but i am living with his grandmother at the moment till i move out of state and i work at her store. I have a lot of respect for his family and do not want to keep this from them but I do not know how to tell them and i am afried that if I do tell her she will No longer let me work with her or stay with her till i move at the end of the month. '

I know he should be the one to tell them but he cant get ahold of them right now, he is military and I mainly only get information from his leadership.

So should i bother telling them or wait till i move out in a couple weeks?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:05 PM on Feb. 5, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Blood is thicker than water.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:06 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • Wait until you move. If he isn't going to tell, then there is no reason why you should have to move out before you're ready or lose your job before you're ready just because you're getting a divorce. JMO.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:11 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • I'd wait
    Nyx7

    Answer by Nyx7 at 5:27 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • other ladies said it all.
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 5:34 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • I think wait too and if found out sooner just stay and stick to that husband's choice was to not tell. Just say that. If problems arise you have channels of support I hope in military to go through for his financial support.

    lfl

    Answer by lfl at 5:36 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • It sounds like he is serving in the military and is on active duty.

    If you move to another state you probably won't be able to get divorced until you establish residency in that state. That could be a year. Then you could have to wait a year after you file for the divorce to be final.

    You need to find out the laws in the state you are living and the state you are moving to. You need to find out if you can take the children and move to another state. Since you have been living with his parents they may be able to file for joint custody or visitation.

    I hope your lawyer thought of all of this. In some states if you are in the divorce process and you leave the state with the children it is kidnapping.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:47 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • He is active but our situation is a little differnt then most. I can move while in the middle of the divorce. thank you for the information it would have been helpful if your situations was typical
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:50 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • I wouldn't tell until I was ready to leave. It will take a long time for this to get any attention anyway. Attorneys take forever to get things started. Since you have children it will take longer. You have to take the class for parents of children of divorce and other required procedural steps before the divorce can be finalized whether you move out of state later or not. Find out all that you have to do before you leave the state.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:13 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • My grandson and his gf stayed with me for a while. I'd be mad as heck if she was living off of me and I was paying her salary meanwhile she was plotting to leave him. Unless you want her to fire you and kick you out, you need to keep your secret to yourself
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:15 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

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