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Leaving an abusive husband, and taking the children across county/state lines

Has anyone ever done this? If so did you suffer any ramifications of your actions? Like being charged with Kidnapping/ Him getting a temporary injuction granting him custody, and an order to take the children? I am wondering because I am currently trying to leave an abusive man, but I have no where to go but out of state!

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:30 PM on Feb. 5, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (34)
  • You can take your children wherever you want if there is no custody agreement, they are your kids so it is not kidnapping.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 9:33 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • Call a wome's shelter and ask for some advice. I'd hate for you to escape only to be arrested for kidnapping and have the kids brought back to him. Be careful!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:33 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • Have you ever had any police reports filed against him? Do you have documentation of the the abuse, pictures, witness accounts, etc. the best thing you can do is enter a domestic violence shelter. they can help you w/ the legal stuff, give you a safe address & help protect you. You should NEVER stay w/ a man who abuses you bc you are afraid to leave, there are many local & national groups that can help you. If you need more info please feel free to pm me, I used to work for a DV agency that had a shelter. I will help you any way I can.

    Answer by Nyx7 at 9:34 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • You can not kidnap your own son if there is no order of custody or visitation. The problem is he might find a sympathetic judge to order you return the children to the state of their residence until custody is decided. Until they've lived somewhere else for 6 monhts they remain residence of that state.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:35 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • check the state laws....

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:35 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • im about to do the same thing, i went to victims assistance at the local police station, where they have records of domestic related calls, and she said not much he can do as long as i get a job and a place right away, so when court does come around i can say that i doing whats best for the children, but im only going 2 hrs away. i left a time b4, just up and left 4 hrs away and he just moved to where i was ended up back together. just stay strong and when you get to where ever you are going see about getting as much help as you can and you should contact the local domestic abuse center and give them a heads up and ask them for advice. and do NOT by any means go back to your husband having been there myself it only gets worse each time you go back. good luck to you

    Answer by gothmama91 at 9:37 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • dont take them across teh state line unless your allowed to.

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 9:38 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • if there is no court order already in place stating that you can't go across state lines, you can do it!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:40 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • I spoke with a lawyer today, after they called and alerted him to what I was doing, and she said that it could be considered kidnapping, So I did contact a women's shelter and was only guarenteed a safe place for the night seeing as it was not deemed an emergency situation, but what I had been told before was that you can leave with your children, but you cannot prevent him from coming and taking them, because it works both ways. Yes there is documented abuse he was arrested about a year ago, convicted, and has a DV on his record. Don't ask why I came back because I don't even know, but I want to get away and with the Shelter offering no guarentee's its not an option from my children and I!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:40 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • She also said something to the effect of 'No judge is going to grant you the right to remove these children from their state of ressidency, He has rights too, you know.' I would also like to add that CPS was involved a couple months back, and told me I could leave the state. I did but returned because they had no case, and my mother was just as verbally abusive, to my children and I as my husband is, I now have a safe place to go too, half a country away, but I don't want to get my friends in trouble for helping me!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:44 PM on Feb. 5, 2010

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