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liars all of them! men that is

So my fiance swore he was gonna stop smoking pot over a year ago. Just this morning I found out hes been lying to me for who knows how long. I told him up front theres 2 things that are a deal breaker for me cheating and drugs so my question is how should I confront him?

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Asked by Anonymous at 2:08 PM on Feb. 6, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • A lie is a lie and it is no way to start a relationship.
    But I dont consider smoking a drug.......... and I am very anti smoking.

    oh and lets not group your lier in with ALL men... though I understand your mad.
    My hubby is NOT a lier.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:09 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • pack his shit and put it on the from door with a not " I hope the high was worth it"

    It you dont live together same thing tell him to hit the raod and tell him the same as above

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 2:09 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • anon 209 she said smoking pot - not just smoking :)

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 2:10 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • welp honey if he lies to you about and knows he cann lose you doing it, that enters him into the area of possible dependence. he is a fiance, fortunataly, not a husband. so now you have to deicide if you want this going on and off again for the rest of your life. cause it likely will if he is lying to you NOW

    Answer by sati769leigh at 2:12 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • OH hell........... I didnt see the word pot.

    I dont date people who break the law. I wouldnt have told him to stop I would never have dated him in the first place.

    Holly hell what kind of stupid question is this.... he is a law breaker.


    Answer by Anonymous at 2:16 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • lol @ anon

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 2:17 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • I'd just ask him and go from there. If you know for a fact he was smoking pot and he lies about it then you have a liar on your hands. Look him in the eye when you ask him and see how easily he lies about it. If he looks away and is uncomfortable with lying to you then you might have a chance at salvaging something. Marriage is about working out problems. If you two can't work this out now then marriage might be something that you would want to consider postponing until you two learned how to handle problem solving.

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:19 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • im having the whole smoking Pot issue also.. when i do tell him i dont like the fact that he smokes he says that he will quit soon and its just a stress reliever.
    so my advise to you is not so much get mad at the fact that hes lying because hes lying about the smoking to keep you but to find out what is the real reason why hes smoking and take it from there. he knows how much it bothers you and as the relationship grows he will know that to fully have you completely he will have to choose you or the drug and chances are he will choose you but right now its something that keeps his mind off of somehting else talk it out (if hes around my BFs age 21-25 its just maybe a social thing that he and his buddies do together that in time he will out grow and not want to anylonger)

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:53 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • I have this same problem. I don't know what you will do but he is not going to stop. He is going to keep lying, and lying, and lying. We have been married almost 10 years now and I wish I had left a long time ago and then leaving would not be as complicated because mine has not changed. He sneaks and does it and is continuing to lie. No regard for the fact thats its illegal or that you dislike it. How long do you want to wait for him to outgrow it? We are married and he has two kids and now has been recently arrested for drugs. Honey I am telling you from experience-it only gets worse.

    Answer by tsd0040 at 5:13 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • OP here so I confronted him and his answer was yes its mine but I wasnt gonna smoke it. He claims he got it a couple months ago and he only smoked a little of it then he felt bad for not keeping his promise so he just stashed it in the garage and forgot about it. Yeah right I spend more time out there than him and I know whats in there and when something is moved around or out of place I just dont know what to do. Thanks for all your advice ladies

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:56 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

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