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Stemming from the food post, "Would you fix your child another meal if they wont eat what you fixed."

This is funny that the post about would you fix your kids another meal if they dont want what you eat, came up right as I was talking to my daughters father sister. Her son is 8 and she fixes 2 meals in her house. I have witnessed it and its sad. Her son doesnt eat anything. If she makes speghetti for dinner she has to make hot dogs or something else for Justin. When I say the boy wont eat anything thats not fried, no side only french fries and absolutely no veggies and fruit. He is 8 a size 14 husky and she is at her whits end with it. No one will watch him not even me because you always have to go out and buy him McDonalds or something or he will cry for real. She doesnt know what to do? Any advice? She is trying to put both of them on a diet because his doctor are concerned? She acts like she is scared sometimes to be stern and yes he takes his own breakfast and lunch to school too. Usually PBJ and chips and juice.

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lilmsnay83

Asked by lilmsnay83 at 8:20 PM on Feb. 6, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 10 (429 Credits)
Answers (18)
  • She created a mess and her son will suffer because of what she created. It's not just about food but she's letting him be the parent and she's going to wish she had grown a back bone by the time he's a teen.

    legalmommy101

    Answer by legalmommy101 at 8:22 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • Nope- This is not Waffle House and I am not a short order chef. You can eat what I give you or you can wait until the next meal. I do make sure to make at least one thing I know my kids love but I do not cater.

    she needs to start subbing food to start and Not give in. Eat it or be hungry. They WILL NOT allow themselves to starve. We have a 4 bite rule(big bites). You eat 4 bite of everything on your plate and you can have seconds of whatever you want. so 4 bites of peas 4 bites of apples and 4 bites of hot dog. eat it and you can have another hot dog. want another hot dog? eat 4 more bite of peas and apples. Usually fills them to the point of not needing that extra hot dog after all.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 8:26 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • I def agree with that. Its embarrassing sometimes. When we go out to eat he refuses to order from the kids menu. All the rest of the kids will and he wont. She does give in to him. All he has to do it pout. But the thing is you cant say anything to her. She gets an attitude if you do. But then she says, I dont know what to do? His doctors are so concerned about him?

    They both was recently in her brothers wedding and neither of them ate anything at the reception. I love her to death but I told her she is just making it worst.
    lilmsnay83

    Answer by lilmsnay83 at 8:26 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • I agree that she has let this get out of control. She will have to find her back bone and be strick with you either eat this or nothing. Let him throw his fit, send him to his room. Search his room for food stashes while he's at school. Keep tabs on all the food in the house. Make sure he isn't skipping dinner and going for a bigger portion of other foods. Keep ONLY healthy snacks in the house. She is going to have to stop his behaviour.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:28 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • she needs to be the parent and tell him he is going to eat what she makes for dinner whether he likes it or not. she needs to make healthy food and not let him eat anything unhealthy period. if she has to ground him or take away his toys to get her point across then so be it. i have a 13 year old sister and a 15 year old brother who my parents let eat whatever they want. they eat very unhealthy. they eat so bad that now they have diabetes. they both weigh more than i do and i'm an adult. it's really sad because they won't healthy and are bratty. she needs to do something now or she will suffer later.
    xavierlogan09

    Answer by xavierlogan09 at 8:29 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • Why is she at witts end? SHE is the one doing it.
    Just don't do it. Period. He may cry, but if she gives in then he knows that is all he has to do to get his way.
    He will eat eventually, he won't starve to death.
    This is very unhealty - and could lead to many health problems.
    She needs to step up and decide that SHE is the parent not him, and SHE gets to make the decisions.
    mommymeg03

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 8:31 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • @ Mommymeg03, i agree. She is at her witts end because the doctor is telling her all this. He is not in any physical activity or anything so no exercise. She babies him alot. He cant go outside and play, he cant ride a bike and she wont let him play with his cousins because she says they are too rough. Like now we are talking on the phone and she was asking me what kind of things they could eat that he might he. SO we were naming some things and she just got frustrated and was like this is too hard because Justin isnt gonna eat it
    lilmsnay83

    Answer by lilmsnay83 at 8:39 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • i would just sit the plate down and if he eats he will eat. if he cries about getting food i made for him then i would put him in his room until he was able to sit at the table and eat what i made. his cries are what is making others just bend to his will and he's gotten his way doing it for long that he knows how to cry and get what he wants. he should learn now while he's young that crying doesn't get you everything you want. it would only take a couple of times for him to realize that he won't get his way by crying.
    angevil53

    Answer by angevil53 at 8:45 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • I did this for a while with my daughter. All she ever wanted was fruit, pb&j and turkey sandwiches so she ate ok and has never been big, however when she turned 5 in Oct I said now you're a big girl you eat like it so now she has to take at least one big bite of everything and if she wants more of anything or a "desert" she has to eat everything on her plate. Keep in mind I don't give her more than maybe 3 big bites worth of the sides and 5 of the main dish. She knows I'm not fixing her anything else and at first she was difficult and would go pout in her room but eventually she would just eat it. They are going to have to just say pout all you want you're eating what I make and that's it ESPECIALLY because his health is at risk.
    jazzysmommy1004

    Answer by jazzysmommy1004 at 8:52 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

  • She needs to stop babing him, make him join a sports team, make him go outside and play, By teaching him the way she is, she is setting him up for faliure as a thriving HEALTHY adult. You have to encourage active play and healthy eating habbits! When they are adults they are more likely to be healthier. dh is overwieght and has lots of health issues. Guess where the wieght began to be a problem? Mom getting him fast food all the time bc it was easier. Him not getting alot of physical exersize as a child/teen. He learned bad eating/exersize habbits and they stayed with him into adult hood. It's harder to reverse this when your an adult.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:54 PM on Feb. 6, 2010

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