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how can i help my husband to undestant that he needs to take his anger out cuz is affecting our relationship?

Nu husband had a very cruel chilhood hid dad would hit him and his brother when they bahaved bad really bad sometimes till bleed. now that his older he fell anger tours hes dad. His parents are separete but sometimes I fell that he still scare of his dad. Now he has a really bad temper and I dont want to live himI want to help him what do I do?

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Asked by Anonymous at 2:40 AM on Jun. 26, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (3)
  • My husband also grew up with an abusive father. Listen and be supportive be sensitive to his feelings. men are not good with talking about how they feel use wisdom in when and were you bring up the topic also say how you feel We have been married 8 yrs and it took time for him to learn this important fact..... You are responsible for your own actions, it does not matter how you grew up you do not have to be just like your dad, you choose to react the way you do, my husband has had to learn to think before he speaks to stop and listen learn to walk away and talk about it later don't forget about it came back to it later he can break the chain with God to help him anything is possible Your job is to love him forgive him and give him a safe place to talk about how he feels I can gaurente he will worry that you do not think he is manly and let him know that you are not going anywhere you made a vow and a promise in good times and in bad stick to it you will be glads you did.

    Answer by livinadream4 at 7:25 AM on Jun. 26, 2008

  • Talk to him about expressing anger in different ways. Tell him that you feel badly when he yells or whatever and that maybe he needs to plan ways to cool off when he gets upset. Use code words to let him know when you think he needs to cool off. Then he can go for a drive, a bike ride, a run, a cool shower, etc. When you're having a good talk sometime talk to him about ways you can help him realize how he's acting and ways to solve it. There are a lot of good books out there and couseling wouldn't hurt!

    Answer by jackimci at 10:51 AM on Jun. 26, 2008

  • I won't talk to mine when he's yelling.I tell him I will talk to him after he calms down, and then I walk away.They get more mad at first, but after a while he stopped yelling so I would talk to him.It might work for you.

    Answer by evelynwest at 1:38 PM on Jun. 26, 2008

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