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How would you word this conversation with a friend?

A friend of ours is currently homeless. She has been staying at the mission but she comes over to our house about twice a week to cook and shower. In the past this was never a problem because she was always polite and cleaned up after herself. But lately she has been sharing our phone number without our permission and as a result we keep getting prank calls.But today was the last straw. She called me from a friend's cell phone and the service was really bad but I heard her say something about using our computer to see how much some baseball cards were worth. I told her no problem, to come on over. She shows up with two other ladies who clearly use drugs. One of them had been kicked out of a rehab program and was looking for another that would take her so she wouldn't break parole and go back to prison. We need to talk to her and let her know that these things are not acceptable. I was hoping somebody could give me some tips?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:26 PM on Feb. 8, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • I think you are an awesome friend:) You do need to talk to her and tell her the rules. Tell her you want to help but she needs to be respectful.
    hill2

    Answer by hill2 at 9:49 PM on Feb. 8, 2010

  • When you become homeless you end up becoming friends with people that have serious problems. Just sit down and tell her the rules of your home. Maybe have her sign a contract.

    legalmommy101

    Answer by legalmommy101 at 9:29 PM on Feb. 8, 2010

  • if she is hanging with druggies, she is likely a druggie herself. stop letting her in your home seriously. I speak from experience here. tough love. it sucks, but you gotta let her go.
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 9:34 PM on Feb. 8, 2010

  • Just be up front and honest with her. Don't leave any room for error on her part. THESE are the rules if you wish to continue to be welcome in our house. DO NOT permit her to be alone EVER in your house. Desperation can make people do things they wouldn't normally do under normal circumstances and I'd rather you not find out just how bad she could end up being.

    Personally I wouldn't allow her at my house any longer but you are clearly way more charitable than I am :)
    Allergic2Stupid

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 9:35 PM on Feb. 8, 2010

  • OP here- Actually she is from our church and I know she does not use drugs. She is friends with them so she can "minister" to them. She is actually really an extremist.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:36 PM on Feb. 8, 2010

  • just sit her down & set some rules like tell her no friends over so you don't have to worry about them..
    maiahlynn

    Answer by maiahlynn at 9:50 PM on Feb. 8, 2010

  • quote- "if she is hanging with druggies, she is likely a druggie herself. stop letting her in your home seriously. I speak from experience here. tough love. it sucks, but you gotta let her go." although this is normally true its not always true.. I had friends in high school doing drugs & I didn't use them with them.. tell her no drugs in your house.. just in case
    maiahlynn

    Answer by maiahlynn at 9:53 PM on Feb. 8, 2010

  • "quote- "if she is hanging with druggies, she is likely a druggie herself. stop letting her in your home seriously. I speak from experience here. tough love. it sucks, but you gotta let her go." although this is normally true its not always true.."


    I wouldn't even say it's normally true. People that are homeless don't get to pick their friends. They are mixed in with people that do have drug problems but that doesn't mean that people that pal around with people that are drug addicts are drug addicts. There are so many people in this world that are born to be "care takers". They love to help others even when they might not be in a situation to help anyone.

    legalmommy101

    Answer by legalmommy101 at 10:11 PM on Feb. 8, 2010

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