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advice? DH won't listen

DH NEEDS to lose weight. he has to lose 30lbs or 3inches off his waist. i've been pressing him to eat right, a certain amount of calories a day, and when he gets home i press him to get on the wii fit or the excercise bike. he gets on it sometimes, but when it comes to the eating he eats what he wants, doesn't even think of calories. when i press him about it (i did the talking thing a long time ago, pressing him is the last thing i wanted but it's what it's come to) all i hear is that he gets it from work every day, he doesn't want to come home and hear it too. to him, i'm supposed to be here to listen and support him. i AM supporting him, but doesn't that also consist of getting him to work out here? if he doesn't lose weight they could chapter him out, and we can't afford that. i'm so stressed and pissed right now...

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:47 AM on Feb. 11, 2010 in Diet & Fitness

Answers (7)
  • Do it with him. Cook wonderful healthy meals and take a long walk or jog with him when he comes home. Cut junk food out of both of your lives (and your home) and it will make it less tempting for him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:50 AM on Feb. 11, 2010

  • I really wish there was some advice I could give you, but it seems like if someone doesn't want to make the change there's nothing you can do. Usually the more you try the more they resist. You could try getting rid of the unhealthy food in the house, but then of course he could always go buy junk food himself. Just try leading by example I guess. I would like to see what other moms have to say, it's such tough situation. Hang in there :)

    Answer by hillaryann at 10:51 AM on Feb. 11, 2010

  • that's just it. i've lost 10lbs in the past month and a half, i've been cooking healthy meals, i excercise occasonally on the wii and excercise bike, but i'm constantly walking, getting up and down, and chasing after the kids.

    he does PT every morning...

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:55 AM on Feb. 11, 2010

  • I kind of agree with what the other comments have said- you can control the food that is in your home if you do the shopping and meal prep, and you could try to do the exercise together to help motivate him to get moving. Maybe try to find replacements for your husbands weaknesses with food- like if he has a sweet tooth there is jello, or instant pudding made with skim milk. If he likes chips, etc, maybe try air popped popcorn or pretzels instead. The 100 calorie packs of snacks are good, too, because the serving size is already set out for you. For the exercise maybe make a competition- we both do the workout and let's see who can lose 5 pounds faster, etc. Other than that, you can't MAKE him do it, that is something he has to choose. Maybe sit down with him and explain you are concerned for his health and career, you don't want to nag him either, but you have to come up with a solution. Good luck. I hope he gets on board.

    Answer by MaryMW at 11:00 AM on Feb. 11, 2010

  • I agree with the previous posters. Go for a walk with him, cook healthy/tasteful meals, etc.

    Weight Watchers is great!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 AM on Feb. 11, 2010

  • First, stop lecturing him like he's a child. Believe me I understand your frustration and want tog et him to work out. However, lecturing him like a child is only going to get him to ignore you. You ARE supposed to listen and support him, not be his parent. So take a step back and look at it from his point of view.

    The best way for him to eat right and lose weight is if you do it with him. Show by example. It can be soo much fun to work out on the Wii Fit together. Then eat healthy and watch your calories with him. Not only are you bonding on something, but you're spending quality time together. Have the whole family join in with you as well, so he's not alone in this. It can be soo daunting to have to work out and lose weight alone. It's a lot easier when your partner or friends are there doing it right along with you. It's less daunting and a lot more fun. So join in with him.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 11:32 AM on Feb. 11, 2010

  • I assume he is aware he needs to lose the weight and he probably has no will power. I suggest you both check out the SparkPeople web site. It's free. He'll be able to keep track of his progress without you pressuring him.

    Make small changes at first - replace beverages with water, bake, broil, and grill - no fried foods. What I found really helpful was after plates are filed with normal size portions at dinner - put all leftovers away before you sit down to eat.

    Find exercises you can do together that don't feel like exercise - my favorite is dancing. Martial arts is another idea. Anything that gets the heart pumping burns calories. Playing basketball or indoor volleyball?


    Answer by PrttyMstng at 6:33 PM on Feb. 12, 2010

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