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The doctor said my 3 year old didn't deserve a prize!

I brought my daughter into the doctors yesterday because she was up every hour the night before complaining about her ears. Of course she was fussy because she didn't feel well put up a little fight. Anyways, she let the doctor do his thing and at the end the doctor says, okay hope your night is better tonight. He walks a away and I said to my 3 year old, see that wasn't so bad he was a nice doctor, do you want to go get your surprise? The doctor stepped back in and said, you really think she deserves a surprise? Caught of guard I said, what? He goes you really think she deserves a prize? I said, yeah, she did good..... he ROLLED HIS EYES AT ME AND WALKED AWAY!!!!!!! I couldn't believe it!

By the way, she ended up having a double ear infection in both ears!

Would you make a complaint?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:31 AM on Feb. 13, 2010 in Just for Fun

Answers (17)
  • I don't think the doctor was right. I think surprises should be for the end of visits not good behavior. His office his rules.

    What I think is important is your behavior. I think you should have explained that to her. "The doctor expects children to cooperate more (if she understands that word) to get surprises. Maybe next time." Then you can decide if you want to continue with that doctor.

    He did nothing wrong.


    Answer by Gailll at 10:38 AM on Feb. 13, 2010

  • Yes I would! Yet now maybe you can take her out for ice cream. Tis what I did and it was an occasion as well. To make the bad go away and have a wonderful time with the ice cream. Mind you that I have three kids so usually three dollars covered theirs. :) Have a great day!:)

    Answer by CloudWeaver at 10:39 AM on Feb. 13, 2010

  • I get that you wanted to reward your daughter for allowing the doctor to examine her ears, and wanting to make your daughter feel better--we ALL do, but I can see the doctor's point too, that having a simple exam is not an "accomplishment," but rather should be expected. KWIM?

    He's probably just an "old school" doctor, and likely sees too many parents reward their children for anything and everything.

    If he's a good doctor, and is good with your child, I wouldn't complain (he's likely the owner or partner in the practice!), what would that accomplish?

    Answer by LoriKeet at 10:39 AM on Feb. 13, 2010

  • if your kid didn't deserve a prize then she didn't deserve one plain and simple. If you think she did, then you get her one.

    Answer by Christina2135 at 10:42 AM on Feb. 13, 2010

  • To be honest if it had been me, I probably would've told my daughter (within the doctors hearing) - that's ok sweetie, the doctor is just being an ass. Then find a new doctor!

    I can't see what she had done to not get her surprise, some doctors just shouldn't deal with kids, even if they are in that field. To my way of thinking, bedside manner with kids is much more important then it is for older people. And I come from a medical family too.

    Answer by daisy521 at 10:44 AM on Feb. 13, 2010

  • Make a complaint about what and to whom? Most kids are not very cooperative at the Dr's office add sickness and they will fussy. That is understandable, but I wouldn't reward any bad behavior even if they were sick.. I would just ignore the comment for now but if it became a problem I would find a new ped.. Kids cry and fuss at the Dr, if he/she doesn't want to deal with it, they should have went into another specialty.

    Answer by midnightmoma at 10:44 AM on Feb. 13, 2010

  • I would have been pretty upset. My son means the world to me and I tend to overreact at times when it comes to things like this. I would take your little one and go buy her a surprise, tell her how great she did and comfort her. GL... I hope she starts feeling better soon.

    Answer by ProudMom_5703 at 10:51 AM on Feb. 13, 2010

  • I'm a little shocked with some of these answers..... You would think that a pediatrician would have some experience with sick toddlers. Maybe this simple exam would be easy for you but not a 3 year old. (KWIM?) I believe my "behavior" was right on, I worked with the doctor and my daughter to make the appointment a comfortable as could be. I did let her know that he needed to look at her ears to make them better. It's not like she was freaking out screaming at the top of her lungs, she was a little fussy.

    For him to roll his eyes at me and say what he said was wrong. The outcome from me making a complaint..... Maybe he won't do it to the next sick kiddo. Have a little compassion. Him being a partner or owner, don't really care.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:57 AM on Feb. 13, 2010

  • "I don't think the doctor was right. I think surprises should be for the end of visits not good behavior. His office his rules."

    Uhhhh....its HER kid HER rules. The little girl is 3 and was up all night w/ a double ear infection...give the kiddo and mommy a break! I wonder where all these children exist where they behave perfectly all the time?!?! I'm with you sister, my 3 year old DD acting fussy at the dentist - she didn't want to open her mouth. The dentist kept going on and on about how grumpy she is and what's wrong with her (b/c she was good last time). I'm thinking this guy doesn't have any kids AND if he does the wife/nanny probably takes care of them.

    Answer by HaileyCass at 11:04 AM on Feb. 13, 2010

  • My kids don't get surprises for doing what they are supposed to do. It sets up the doctor's office as this scary place that if you survive you get a treat. If she didn't cooperate, and she must not have if the doctor commented on it, you might want to think about it. You sounded very surprised about it, which indicates him making comments was out of character. This could mean your kid was especially obnoxious. Mine isn't 3 quite yet, and even with a double ear infection, I expect her to act human while getting examined. And yes, we've so been there. I don't allow my kids to misbehave just because they feel bad. The fact that she did, and the doctor knows you're still rewarding her, does make you look bad. It would be fine if your kid misbehaved, because Lord knows kids are kids. But if you reward her for it, that's where a problem comes in. Next time, she knows she can be a butt and still get her surprise.

    Answer by whiteroses82 at 11:34 AM on Feb. 13, 2010

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