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Why do women have babies then hand them over to their moms/dads/other family to take care of?

It seems like a new trend that young moms hand their babies over to relatives to care for their baby.
I have a cousin who is 25 and was trying for years to have a baby, the baby is 4 months old and has spent less then 45 days with her mommy.
I have a niece that has 3 kids, 1 on the way. When she is pregnant she is fine and has her kids, but when she gives birth she goes back to partying!
and her dad takes care of the kids for months without hearing from her.
I can think of a few other situations too where the woman is pregnant then drops off the baby to do as she pleases.
I had my 1st at 17 and I had to take care of her, I knew she was mine to care for. which is fine I would never want to miss any of the milestones or watching them grow up.
Is it a trend to drop off your baby these days? and just go about your life like you never even had a baby.


Asked by Anonymous at 1:49 AM on Feb. 14, 2010 in Just for Fun

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • Because instead of the parents trying to be role models for their children, they think that their children need to become their cheerleaders and tell them how great they are for sacrificing time with them to go work a fruitless 40 hour week job that could be filled by someone else. You parent only once in a lifetime. Children need quality time in quantity, not be shoved off on someone else because they are an inconvience and an impedence upon your personal goals in life. If your not going to be there then don't have kids, get your tubes tied, or give them up for adoption to a loving two parent home that makes them a priority and values their existence.

    I do understand that there are exceptions to this and there are allowances to be made.

    Answer by Heathercurlz at 1:57 AM on Feb. 14, 2010

  • I dont really think it is a new thing lol...

    but yes I hate that... I was 18 when i had mine and I harly ever go anywhere without them let alone letting someone raise them....

    My BIL had 2 kids with this women who is 10 years older than me....she never took care of them ( neither did BIL) and now my MIL has adopted them -- MIL is 65 and in bad health and when something happens to her, who gets to raise them--me... but obviosuly she doesnt care since she hasnt even called to check on them in over a year -- and as soon as we get custody she will be completely cut out of their lives...

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:02 AM on Feb. 14, 2010

  • Who knows. I haven't even been separated from my youngest for more than a couple of hours at a time yet. And even those times, I could count on my fingers, and she's 6 months old. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

    Answer by tyrelsmom at 2:16 AM on Feb. 14, 2010

  • They do it because the family enables them to. They need to sit her down and remind her that she has kids that need their mother. She needs to give her head a shake....hopefully nothing falls out.

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 2:26 AM on Feb. 14, 2010

  • I was 25 when DS was born and my mom had to actually ask to hold him as I never left him with a sitter unless I was at work, other than that, I have my son 24/7
    Burns my ass when I see people do that! My ex SIL does that with her DD's

    Answer by Starfire73 at 2:58 AM on Feb. 14, 2010

  • I have to agree with some of the answers it is all on the family to say hey these are your kids YOU TAKE CARE OF THEM but no they dont.. as for the one who was trying to hard to have a baby and then gets one and turns it over to family now thats wrong in sooo many ways .. we have been trying and nothing.. how I wish I could have a baby and hold it and take care of it.. I wouldnt hand it over thats for sure.. some people just dont need to be mothers at all...


    Answer by an-angles-mom at 6:54 AM on Feb. 14, 2010

  • Heathercurlz hit the nail on the head!!

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 7:54 AM on Feb. 14, 2010