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!FAILURE OF A MOTHER?

Ive been struggling terribly as for being a good mother & fiance, Ive been having so changes in my life for about 3 years now & I know what a good mom is & I know what to do but I CANT/WONT/ DONT KNOW HOW TOO This probably sounds messed up but I dont know how to play with my son, I rarely cook for my family, I never get to go out b/c im not aloud I feel trapped & this is why i think im like this, I dont read to my son or really spend alot of 1 on 1 time with him, Please Please help me fix this I need help please dont bash on me Im asking for help!
Emily 21 year old Mother of 1 Boy & Fiance to his father

 
doms_mommy

Asked by doms_mommy at 4:03 PM on Feb. 15, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 3 (19 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • I am so sorry for all you are going through. You need to make a change not only for yourself, but for your son. Try and set a schedule like before bedtime to read to your son, even if it is just one book. The quality time spent together is most important and most precious. I am not sure of the age of your son but there are plenty of activities and fun things you can do together. Even if it is sitting down with him to build blocks together. I would suggest getting involved with a playgroup. If you are feeling trapped or not allowed to go out then you need to seek help. The olny way any of this will change is by you. I hope things get better. Know that we are here for you....
    Kellyjude1

    Answer by Kellyjude1 at 5:38 PM on Feb. 15, 2010

  • You should talk to a therapist about this. That is what helped me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:05 PM on Feb. 15, 2010

  • Is your child ALIVE?

    Then you HAVE NOT FAILED.

    It sounds trulky like you need some in person third party help. Please talk to your doc about depression. And what do you mean, "not allowed?" By WHOM? If it's DAD...then you need OUT right this second.

    211 is a nationwide help line for social services...call it. They can help you. You need more than you can get here. But NO. You are NOT A FAILURE till someone's DEAD.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 4:06 PM on Feb. 15, 2010

  • I know someone who you can probably talk to, do you want me see if that person will pm you?

    The fact that you are saying you are now allowed out means you feel that someone is physically, emotionally one or both of those, stopping you from leaving or getting out.

    It's so important to know that you have legal and emotional rights.

    Good for you for asking for help.
    lfl

    Answer by lfl at 4:07 PM on Feb. 15, 2010

  • You know what your doing wrong..you know what you should be doing do it!! Make yourself ..then it will become a habit.
    3beautbabies

    Answer by 3beautbabies at 4:10 PM on Feb. 15, 2010

  • You should have some adult time though. Thats something you should work on with your fiance but its making you ignore your son and its not his fault. Take yourself back to childhood and put yurself in his position when you put him to bed with no book or see him sitting or playing alone.
    3beautbabies

    Answer by 3beautbabies at 4:13 PM on Feb. 15, 2010

  • You need to leave that disgusting person who thinks he's a man.
    SaraP1989

    Answer by SaraP1989 at 4:15 PM on Feb. 15, 2010

  • I clicked on this because I honestly expected to see a picture of myself here. :-(

    I rarely play with my kids, I don't know how and I just feel awkward. My two sons both have horrible tempers, my oldest doesn't listen to anything. I rarely cook but I think that's more because my DH loves to cook so he's the one to do it. I don't clean very often, I just can't get motivated to do anything. A lot of the time I sit and stare.

    I'm pregnant with #3 and depressed.

    P.s. I'm answering anonymously because I don't want anyone to give me parenting advice. I was just trying to answer the question and let her know that she is not alone.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:23 PM on Feb. 15, 2010

  • anon. your kids prob. have issues because you don't have anything to do with them. If you can't play with your kids or do anything for them (Cook or clean) why are you preg. again?!?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:34 PM on Feb. 15, 2010

  • frustrated

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:35 PM on Feb. 15, 2010

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