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what would you do

ke so both me my mom dad and sisters have a seizure disorder i am currently 3 months pregnant and been yanked off all my meds i want to keep the baby but yet at the same time i want it to have 2 parents. they type of seizures i have are new to the medical science world and are still being studied i worry if i give up this baby and it is born with seizures that ppl will respond to it like they did with me very badly do i keep it cause i know how to handle seizures and have lived with them for 23 years or do i give it up and risk someone that dont know what they r doing getting hurt or hurting the baby

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:12 PM on Feb. 16, 2010 in Adoption

Answers (15)
  • That's a tough one. Don't just give up your child because you are single though. I know plenty of single moms who do a way better job than a couple. If you do choose adoption though, they can make the adoptive parents aware of the disorder so they are prepared. I hope you are able to make the right choice for you. Good luck!!

    Answer by imamommmmyyy at 11:14 PM on Feb. 16, 2010

  • Dear heart, that is such a hard decision you are facing. Is there a reason you want to give up the baby? Is it about the finacial or the seizures? That is not a decision to ask someone. That is such a powerful question, too important for you to ask on Cafe mom. You will have to look deep inside yourself and ask God. Now that said, I would keep my baby. But that is just me. You may cause some family undue stress in their life by having a child with that condition. Unless you are giving the baby to people you know and can be in the babies life. I say pray my friend, pray , pray, pray.

    Answer by my2kids312 at 11:20 PM on Feb. 16, 2010

  • You would give your baby up for adoption just so the baby would have 2 parents. What? Then you think people other than you can't take care of a baby with seizures. You should be worried that a single mother may put her baby in danger because she has seizures. That because you have seizures you may die and leave the baby with 0 parents. You aren't thinking a lot of things through clearly.

    Since you have a disease that can't be treated while you are pregnant you should consider abortion. You and your baby could end up dead. If you have the baby you should consider sterilization since you can't be treated while pregnant and since your condition is passed from parent to child.

    I have a horrible genetic disease so I have had to deal with these kinds of issues. Life is not fair. By the way, if you keep the baby seizure disorders can be treated while breastfeeding.

    Answer by Gailll at 11:23 PM on Feb. 16, 2010

  • I forgot to mention there are genetic counselors that help people with these kinds of decisions.

    Answer by Gailll at 11:25 PM on Feb. 16, 2010

  • Gailll is very WRONG here.. having a seizure disorder is NO REASON to consider abortion!!! that would be a personal decision. You have to decide what is best for the child.
    Chances are if you gave the child up for adoption there would be extra efforts made to find a family that is familiar with seizure disorders, looking to adopt a special needs child, or the such. Just make sure your disorder is known to whoever you would go through to give the child up.
    Giving the child up just because you are single seems a little silly to me.. but if it means that much to you then its something you'd have to take into consideration. Good luck!

    Answer by kristal2146 at 1:22 AM on Feb. 17, 2010

  • Gaill's disorder is chronic stupidity and diarrhea of the mouth!!! Anyways you should only place your child for adoption because you are unable to take care of that child not because you are single. If you can love and care for that child then it belongs with you. If you are not able to take care of that child and love it then yes adoption is best. When you do adoption the adoptive parent are aware of the disorder, but please remember that some adoptions do not really happen and that child could end up in group homes, and foster care. I think that you should speak to a counselor about this so that you can truly figure out what it best for you and the baby. Good luck.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 2:26 AM on Feb. 17, 2010

  • If you choose adoption then they ask you for a medical history at which time you can disclose your family history of seizures. If you aren't ask then tell them.

    Answer by baconbits at 10:01 AM on Feb. 17, 2010

  • Hi,I have a temporal lobe disorder aka as petite seizures and never had an abortion.My m.d.s knew of my disorder ,was off meds and all my children are healthy, no one died during pregnancy due to seizure complications.Also despite being on seizure meds and having lupus I am quite happy I am alive;.that my mom did not have an abortion.I am pro-choice but find it just weird someone would suggest an abortion to a woman that has not indicated she wants one simply because she has chronic medical disorder.My my anyway I am also a birth mother and if you want to keep your baby then do so.You,as anyone does,will need to prepare,plan, think things through because you are going to be a mom.If you want to keep your child and are prepared to do what moms do married or not then congrats on your new baby.


    Answer by drfink at 11:42 AM on Feb. 17, 2010

  • Choosing adoption for your baby doesn't guarantee two parents. Adoptive parents aren't magic people. They can divorce or die just like any other people.

    Answer by onethentwins at 1:12 PM on Feb. 17, 2010

  • DITTO...TO Bacon...Ditto TO DRFINK....AND Ditto to OTT! ONE should never consider adoption as an 'end-all' or a 'solution' of which there is NO GUARANTEE, Plain and Simple. Adoption is for a child, that has NO ONE whom loves him/her, can take care of him/her, or keep him/her safe, healthy loved! DO any of these criteria fit you???? What about the babys' Daddy, seems to me, most of us forget there is a whole other 'SIDE' of an infants life ,that may care enough to be there(Aunts, Uncles, Nieces, Brothers, Sister). I feel certain, that YOU will KNOW, when the time comes, and you hold your baby....then and only then should you consider this option. ABORTION...well in HEARING your thoughts, I can tell this is NOT an option for you, KUDOS! I am pro-choice, by the way:) Adoption guarantees only 2 things, 1. A family made from strangers. 2. changing a childs life, and yours...FOREVER! Think very hard before acting, C.J/

    Answer by ceejay1 at 1:45 PM on Feb. 17, 2010

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