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How can I tell my friends/co-workers that I have decided to limit my consumption of alcoholic beverages to once in a blue moon, as oppose to our Happy Hour get togethers every friday?

I am great friends with a group of girls who enjoy getting together for Happy Hour, at least once a week. I enjoy their company and I don't want them to stop inviting me but I have lost interest in drinking. I don't want to bite my tongue so I will say that I might have one margarita on date night with my hubby, which only happens once in a blue moon...any advice? Do you believe that my only solution is to find a new group of friends who do not like to drink?

 
alejandra559

Asked by alejandra559 at 1:36 AM on Feb. 18, 2010 in Relationships

Level 12 (699 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • Assuming that you don't have a drinking problem, I'd say just don't make an issue of it at all. Go with them to happy hour and order something non-alcoholic. If someone notices and says something, tell them you don't feel like drinking. You could also suggest some non-drinking activities if you want to hang out with them in a different way. I think a lot of people come to a point in their lives where they grow out of the drinking scene.

    If you do have a drinking problem and you're trying to make changes, chances are your success depends on limiting your exposure to environmental triggers. So in that case, I'd say it's better not to go at all and to find a group of friends that do more than drink when they get together.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:10 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • do you do things w/ them outside of happy hour? If not, chances are, you may need to find new friends. This is a tough situation to get out of, been there.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:39 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • it seems that everything we do together involves drinking. We attend each others family functions (e.g., kids birthday parties, family reunions) but other than that, drinking is it.
    alejandra559

    Answer by alejandra559 at 1:42 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • hey mommy you DO NOT have to explain anything to anyone,if you dont want to you just dont,if they dont like it then find new pals.
    BUSYLOVINGHIM

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 1:43 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • If you still want to go with them, just go and order a coke or something. If somebody says anything just say you are not in the mood for a drink, just good company. You don't have to explain anything really. ;o)

    Morgain

    Answer by Morgain at 1:44 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • If it's mostly drinking when you get together, you may just have to slowly say "I can't." And eventually they will stop asking.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:45 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • Yeah, it doesn't have to be an issue...just order a coke or something like the above poster said.. if confronted, it may be hard to not come off as self righteous, people who drink can take offense when you don't join them, just tell them you're having fun and drinking makes you feel like crap the next day so you'd rather pass, try not to make a thing of it so they don't feel criticized for their decision to drink...to each her own.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:50 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • First, stand by your decision, you'll be happy you did in the long run. As others have said, go along and have a soda or something. You may have a different perspective after doing this a few times and wind up not really getting that much enjoyment out of it when you view it from a sober standpoint (not that you got drunk before, but you know what I mean). Depending on how much these ladies drink and how they act when doing so, you may decide it's not your thing after all. Conversely, if they see you having a good time without alcohol, maybe they might decide to cut back. No matter what, just be casual about it so they don't get the impression you think you're judging their decision to drink. It will all play itself out for the best in the end. I think you're making a good decision. Alcohol and coworkers can lead to problems sometimes. Best to keep things on the professional level.
    Valerie_in_Cali

    Answer by Valerie_in_Cali at 2:45 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • Why can you not go and just not drink alcohal?? I dont drink but still have a ood time iwth my friends.
    IMAMOM2-2KIDS

    Answer by IMAMOM2-2KIDS at 4:03 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • Ask them if they want to go to a movie or something instead of happy hour. As for the what to tell them...why do you need to tell them anything? Just order something non-alcoholic.
    Kimposible

    Answer by Kimposible at 6:10 AM on Feb. 18, 2010