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Holding out for something more?

I have a guy that I've been friends with for about a year now and we've worked together for 2 years. In December we ended up having sex and have done it a couple times since. Each time after we talk about how important our friendship is and how we don't want to jeopardize it. He knows that I have feelings for him and he's told me that he considers me one of his closest people and that he knows he can always count on me but he's not sure what he wants right now. I have never been closer to someone before and I know that it's more than a friends with benefits thing because we didn't have sex for 2 months and then just on valentines day we did again. Neither of us is seeing anyone else, and I don't have any other prospects at the moment, but I'm not sure how to handle things. Should I wait around and see if it progresses into something else, or should I be out there trying to meet new people? CONT...

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:07 AM on Feb. 18, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (18)
  • I don't want to lose the amazing connection we have, but I know that if I were to meet someone else that things wouldn't be the same. He's really the only person that I'm interested in on all levels.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:08 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • Definitely see other people. He doesn't feel the connection that you do.

    Answer by Bmat at 9:10 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • yes see new people..obviously he only sees you as friends with bennys

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:13 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • if he is really that into you he will show concern of you dating others or maybe you should tell him how you feel

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:15 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • If you see other people it will help you build confidence in your relationship experiences. It also shows him not to dilly dally around bc someone else might snatch you up and steal you away. It's good to let men know they have competition. It makes him work harder to please you. He may even decide to run all men off and be your only. So play the field but have eyes for him. You can continue to tell him how important he is to you.

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:16 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • He is playing with your head. Go out and meet other men and have friendships and don't make hime the center of your universe. Please he is really a wanna be player......

    Answer by bella69147 at 9:25 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • Thanks admckenzie!!! You're right, he has a lot on his plate right now working 2 jobs and he has a son of his own, so sometimes I think he's afraid that he wont be able to give me what I need. I think that he just needs to see that he could lose me if he doesn't make a decision. I'm going to keep things the way they are, but not eliminate other options when they come along.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:26 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • Also, to those who said he doesn't have the same connection or that he's a player, after knowing him for this long, I know that it's not the case. We've had many convo's about our feelings and how extremely important our friendship is and how before everything else that's what matters most. It's also not a friends with benny's because after being friends for a year, it's only happened 3 times in 2 months, so that's really not our main focus, we just can't help it sometimes because our connection is so strong. I'm not going to wait around and I've told him that, but I think he just needs to realize it for himself.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:28 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • you must not have much experience with men

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:32 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • you didnt have sex for 2 months and then you did again on vday? either he is seeing an old flame, talking to someone else, or doing lots of whacking off.

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:34 AM on Feb. 18, 2010

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