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Unconsious Sex

I have issues sleeping so occasionally I will take ambien. Not very often. The first time I took it, it really wiped me out. The next morning my husband commented on the wild sex we had. I said wtf do you mean. He then described the act and I was sure he was lying because I didn't remember any of it and he says I did things that I can't image myself doing. But I guess it did happen! So I just laughed it off and said I need to be careful with the med. Last night I took some because I hadn't been able to sleep well for days. I hadn't taken it in over 3 weeks. This a.m. i woke up naked. I asked my husband why and he said because we had sex. AGAIN i don't remember! This time I was not happy at all. I feel violated for some reason even though apparently I was a willing participant. I told him that he was to never have sex with me if I have taken it and he said ok but I am just upset about it. Who else would be mad about this?

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Asked by Anonymous at 7:49 PM on Feb. 18, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • Did you post about this a couple of weeks ago?

    I would feel angry too, especially if your dh reveled in the uncharacteristic sex acts he got you to preform while you were out. I personally wouldn't trust him anymore and would not take the Ambien again.

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 7:55 PM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • I take ambien too, and even before starting on we agreed we wouldn't make love when it's really kicked in...basically there's a time limit from the moment I take the pill. I don't mind being a little loopy, but yeah, I figured I'd be freaked out too if I couldn't remember it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:58 PM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • Heh... Oddly enough, I've had this exact same thing happen while on Ambien. The problem is that in person you will seem COMPLETELY okay to your husband. And he won't know the difference. There was one time that I had Ambien sex and I sort of remembered it but I don't remember being able to react to it at all. I literally couldn't see more than a freaky looking shadow that was my husband. I had to feel his arms to make sure that it was actually my husband! It was really weird. The second time (and any other time after) I don't really remember it. It really doesn't bother me that I don't remember it or that we had sex without me realizing because I know that I seemed like I was a willing participant even though I had no idea what was going on.

    I wouldn't dwell on it. That's one of the effects of Ambien. They actually have had incidents of people driving while on Ambien. I'd rather have sex I can't...

    Answer by kittyhasclaws at 7:59 PM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • remember than go out driving.

    Answer by kittyhasclaws at 7:59 PM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • i know people who take ambien who say they have done some crazy things while taking it...not just sex...all kinds of crazy

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:01 PM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • Ambien sounds really dangerous. I have a friend who did go out driving in the middle of the night but fortunately didn't have an accdent. I would take a calcium and magnesium vitamin pill instead because that is the natural way to relax and sleep. No way would I take ANY sleeping pill.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:03 PM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • Maybe you shouldn't take Ambien.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:19 PM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • the first time it happened? ok you and hubby had no idea what would happen so he could have thought you were "present". but then after you took it a second time, and he once again had sex with you(and I am assuming he knew you took it)...sorry but according to the law thats sexual assault. NO I am not sayign your dh is a violent rapist, what is true tho is he took advantage of you. if would creep me out that my husband thought it was fun to have sex with me, while I wasnt even there...kinda to answer your question? yeah it would bother the hell outta me.

    Answer by Bearsjen at 8:20 PM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • I occasionally have "sexsomnia" so I know how you feel! My husband says I molest him in his sleep(like he minds! :) Mine happens when I'm really stressed out.I guess my body knows the best stress reliever is some nooky!

    Answer by TMJ121099 at 8:37 PM on Feb. 18, 2010

  • op No I didn't post a couple of weeks ago about this.

    We have a great sex life and try new things all the time so maybe he thought I was trying new things the first time. Anyway for some reason it didn't freak me out the first time but the second time I wasn't happy. I do know he won't be doing it again as I told him never to do it again. I am just glad that I am not the only one.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:12 PM on Feb. 18, 2010

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