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Want to help my cousins but not sure how

Sorry if this is long.

My aunt passed away this morning. Her daughters (my cousins) are so young, one is a sophomore in high school and the other is in her first year of college. We haven't seen them much over the past dozen years or so because of a nasty divorce between my uncle (my mom's brother) and my aunt. I don't know exactly what happened because I was a teenager. I guess things were bad enough that my aunt left sole custody of my 15 year old cousin to her 18 year old sister.

Since my aunt and uncle divorced, we always invited my aunt and cousins to family events, but they never came. I really want to help these girls out and let them know they have a huge family here to support them (they have no other family in the US).

I don't know why, but my aunt refused to see even my grandma (my uncle's mom, not hers) who flew into town just to see her and help out. So I don't even know if we should go to the funeral.

Answer Question

Asked by lewseatea at 4:37 PM on Feb. 19, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 3 (18 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • I am sorry about your aunt passing, but times like this call for family unity if only at the funeral, make an effort and go whatever happened it has nothing to do with you.

    Answer by older at 4:40 PM on Feb. 19, 2010

  • Pay your respects and see what you can do and if it looks like not much you can do just leave sometimes people rather handle it alone or be alone...just keep in touch.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:41 PM on Feb. 19, 2010

  • Well if I were you I would really think about going to the funeral. You know the relationship you had with her and if you think going to the funeral is the right thing to do then go for it! Don't let anybody phase you! As far as the girls, yes you should definately let them know that your family is willing and able to help them! I had some cousins that I never got to see until they grew up. Their mother hated our side of the family and we never could understand why until we actually got the story from my cousins. There was more going on in their home that my aunt was ashamed of and didn't want to run the chance of my family finding out! So probably there was more going on and now is the time, more than ever, that they need their family! Good luck and keep us posted!!

    Answer by cgonzales542 at 6:06 PM on Feb. 19, 2010

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