Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How would you respond to a friend who makes a snide remark about how much you've changed since high school?

This is all based on a pic posted on Facebook (she didn't know you then, just now as a mom)? Her tone was clearly of rude "surprise" when saying just how different you look now---20 years later, insinuating you don't look as great or something! And your feelings were hurt for a minute but you're trying to get past it. How would you respond? Thanks.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:40 AM on Feb. 20, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • I would just say "Yeah I was a hottie back then. Too bad I couldn't keep my looks. I'm sure YOU know what I mean."
    treehugger823

    Answer by treehugger823 at 10:52 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • It's hard to answer this question without knowing what it is that she said. People tell me I look different too and high school wasn't really that long ago for me. About 7 years. Anyway....I would assume that she lacks tact and write it off as her own problem not mine. If you feel good about yourself, then why does it matter what someone else says? Ya know?
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 10:53 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • well we aren't all stuck in a time warp, where we all look the same x amount of year later!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:53 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • You might consider an alternative meaning to her comment and respond with Thank you.
    805Therapy.com

    Answer by 805Therapy.com at 11:10 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • "You might consider an alternative meaning to her comment and respond with Thank you."--I like this one.
    forevermom75

    Answer by forevermom75 at 11:14 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • I don't know about you, but I look better now than I did then I think. Having children gave me curves I never had before and up till I was around 30 I was still ID'd so truthfully.... I'm glad I finally look like a wife and Mom instead of a high school person and if anyone commented to me about the difference, that's what I'd tell them.

    Women are so catty tho (not all but a lot) and she prolly never looked as good as you did and is jealous, or maybe there's a weight, boob, hair color difference that is a dramatic change?
    i'd let it go or straight up ask how she meant that because I don't like assuming things.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 11:26 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • First off I don't care what others think of me. If she's doing this then she has an issue. Don't take it personally and make it your issue. Of course, we've changed. Life happens and we grow up...for me I grew out but not one person gave me grief over putting on 100 lbs at my last reunion. So the hot Prom Queen is a fattie now...I like me. That's all that matters. You should be proud of who you are as a person and she can drop off the deep end. If she bothers you then see if you can block her. I hear FB just changed things again. Can't they get it right?
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:34 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • I was going to say ignore it and make no response, but I like these ideas:

    I would just say "Yeah I was a hottie back then. Too bad I couldn't keep my looks. I'm sure YOU know what I mean."

    You might consider an alternative meaning to her comment and respond with Thank you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:35 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • I wouldn't have any interest in her friendship if it were me, she's unkind...real friends or people who are worthy of being your friend don't say hurtful things like that. You don't deserve it, you shouldn't be put in the position to defend yourself ...or say something back that puts her in her place...I'd remove her from my friends list if it were me, just not even deal with her at all.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:05 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • Don't know what I would say as a response but what I will say here is, Is there anyone here that hasn't changed in the last 20 years? For better or worse does not matter, everyone changes. And some idiot that thinks we should all look the same as we did in high school does not show she has much intelligence and therefore, I could not be her friend.
    TarLion

    Answer by TarLion at 3:23 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.