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Speaking of pornography..

How would you feel/what would you do/say if your hubby said to you "I'd rather just get it quickly done myself. It takes less time and energy" and now has only had sex with you twice in 7 months.. and only after you climbed on top of him naked and "ready" .. You climbed on top of him naked a couple other times and were rejected because of your lack of "readiness" and it was too much "effort", not because he was sick or had a headache or something.

I don't really care if we don't have sex terribly often, but this is getting ridiculous now.

Help!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:13 AM on Feb. 20, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • If it were me honestly, I would threaten divorce if he didn't get help cuz that is not right.
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 11:15 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • He is cheating on you with porn. Seek help for him, today!
    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 11:25 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • I dont think its from porn....sounds like hes definitely cheating or has cheated....weird behavior in any other aspct of your relationship? Could he be trying to avoid giving you an STD from another woman (SOs suggestion on that one)....you guys are going to need some help with that....talk to him or start making the steps to leave...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:46 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • He doesn't give a rats ass about you! Leave the selfish bastard!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:56 AM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • girl once a week hummm okay, twice im 7 MONTHS, now thats just crazy!
    you need to get him help nowwww, if its not to late.
    i wish you and your marriage the best of luck!!!!!
    god blesss
    yamil519

    Answer by yamil519 at 12:06 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • I had the same problem some years back. Once my dh knew just how much it bothered me that he would rather be with himself and the computer he put an end to it. It was not as easy as that. I had to be more available. And with 2 small children all day I didn't always what him all over me. But, if you are not "ready" when he is, try watching with him. It isn't for everyone, but sometimes it helps!! As we aged and got back to a more "normal" schedule for us we are both happy. But I agree, I can go awhile with out wanting sex, but twice in 7 months. Not even me!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:39 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • This will be a radical suggestion I realize, but have you tried talking with him about this?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:06 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • OP here. I don't think he's cheating.

    To the anon who suggested I speak to him.. I HAVE.. I've just not been terribly pushy about it lately. He seems stressed lately. He said "when you were pregnant I didn't push you to have sex for 4 months. You can leave me alone can't you?" That was a few months ago after I was being pushy, and I've not been pushy since he said that, and he's made absolutely no attempt what-so-ever to initiate sex with me and when I ask if he wants to have sex he says not tonight he's tired / it is too much effort / he'd rather "take care of it" himself.

    I just don't understand why sex has become so "difficult" for him. I was very aggressive about it for a bit and he was really upset by that.

    Our relationship is suffering because I am not as happy without any sex. He's otherwise affectionate and I try to take the affection further and he pushes me away.

    I don't get it!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:44 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

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