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My 5 year old is obsessed with being the prettiest all the time. What should I do??

My daugher is obsessed with how she looks. She asks me all the time if she's pretty, if she's the prettiest...who is the prettiest in her class. I feel really concerned for her, and I'm not sure what to do. I DEFINITELY am NOT obsessed with how I look. I'm a stay at home mom of two, who wears comfy clothes all day, so I'm not sure where she gets this from! She also talks about boys a lot and is always worried about if boys think she is pretty. I feel like I don't know what to do to stop this obsessiveness. Any suggestions?! I want my beautiful girl to feel beautiful without having to worry about it all the time!

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Asked by mamigrijalva at 9:30 PM on Feb. 20, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (9)
  • Who is she playing with and what does she watch on tv? Those are things that need to be looked in to.
    Or, does she suddenly have new friends at school who are obsessed with their looks? Talk about peer pressure at an early age.

    Answer by jmpeskie at 9:34 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • My Mom always taught me that 'pretty is as pretty does' ...which taught be to strive to be as kind and caring as I could possibly be... and that it didn't matter what I looked like on the outside if I wasn't a good person on the inside.

    Answer by chocolatluver at 9:35 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • Maybe she needs to see a professional. My daughter is 9 and still is not concerned with her looks. Ask her teacher who she hangs out with at school. Why would she care about boys at age 5? That would make me very nervous too. Please seek help.

    Answer by oliviahank at 9:37 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • Oh I think that 's cutefigure skating


    Answer by staceynoel at 9:40 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • Why don't you ask her why she's worried about being pretty and if boys think she's pretty?

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:51 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • I agree with the PP...just sit her down and ask here why she thinks that and who told her she has to be that way and all that.... She'll tell you. It is a bit concerning.... You don't want to raise a narcissist!

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 10:24 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • I have to agree with it coming from other kids. ..Older girls perhaps? Does she ride the school bus? Play with neighborhood kids? Hang out with older sisters or cousins? That or she's hanging out with girls her age in her class who are hanging out with older girls with this behavior and passing it on. I don't think normal 5yo girls are worried about boys and the boys' opinions of their looks.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:25 PM on Feb. 20, 2010

  • I think it's normal. Something she will grow out of. This is the age where girls start getting their first crush, and boys think girls are icky. She could be crushin'. Or I could be wrong...

    Answer by Kali177 at 1:40 AM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • Girls are concerned more, in this day and age, about their looks, how thin they are and if their clothes are a certain brand name. This is just the beginning, for your daughter. If she is obsessing about how pretty she is, at age 5, you may want to sit her down and ask her, point blank, why do you want to know if I think you are pretty? Then ask her if someone in particular has told her that she is pretty. If so, find out who.

    Answer by Twilightmom7 at 2:34 AM on Feb. 21, 2010

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