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Any moms with introverted children?

I would like to connect with other moms who are raising introverted children. I am an introverted person myself with high sensitivity issues as well. Other than my eldest daughter(whos with me and the lo most of the time) other people think I'm just overprotective, but I know my kids and since most people are extroverted they can not relate because they don't get it. Hoping someone here can share in dealing with others etc.

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Asked by 1stthings1st at 2:08 PM on Feb. 21, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (5)
  • I would recommend a regular weekly playgroup so that your child can learn to socialize/interact with others. It may be overwhelming at first but he will probably come around. Preschool is another great option. Specifically, the "public" preschool in your area. These are designed for students with special needs but federal law mandates that a certain number of regular ed students be in the classroom as well. I suggest this because the staff will be well trained and will have more strategies for helping your child interact with his peers and if it's more than a question of him being shy, they're trained to help you with that.
    One of my boys is quite shy and in the past it has taken him up to 30 or 40 minutes of a play date to even go near the other kids and the toys (and he's a twin so he's used to having another child around). I recently went back to work and they're at a public preschool full time. It has worked wonders for

    Answer by twinclubmom at 9:19 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • cont'd.

    I'm shy but not as shy/socially awkward as my husband. I've always felt that DH might be on the spectrum and so have been concerned for my sons as well. We attended a playgroup through Early Intervention as well as a drop in playgroup at a local house of worship prior to going to preschool.

    The bottom line is: he needs to have regular opportunities to interact with other children and the pediatrician needs to be in the loop so that if he is on the spectrum, you can get intervention sooner rather than later.
    Hang in there and good luck!

    Answer by twinclubmom at 9:24 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • Personality is set at birth. Trying to "make" someone be something they are not is futile. You are a good mom because you recognize your child's personality and "protect" (I like to call it good parenting and intimate knowledge of your child) your child from situations you know that may be over his or her head.  There is nothing wrong with being an introvert.  Actually a lot of people confuse shy and introvert.  An introvert is a private person and is selective about whom they invite into their inner circle and share information and activities.  You can be an introvert and not be shy.  I know many people who are introverts but are very socially well adjusted individuals.  They just don't talk a lot about themselves, are content to eat lunch by themselves reading, or just having one or two good friends over instead of a huge group.  Being shy can mean you want to be part of the larger group,


    Answer by frogdawg at 11:34 AM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • you want to be the cheerleader, or president of the class - but you feel uncomfortable speaking up and participating. Of course you can be shy and an introvert. Okay that one is a bummer. But when you have a child who is either shy or an introvert there are things/activities you can do to respect your child's personality but still have them active. Try a small dance class, karate, or art class. Something outside of school where they can develop their individual interests and identity away from the larger pressures of their classmates. Piano or other musical lessons is another good avenue. Small play groups with other moms and one or two children the same ages as yours where she can develop a relationship that can be carried on in school. Talking to the teachers and asking them to modify how they interact with her and be her cheerleader in difficult situations when they come up.


    Answer by frogdawg at 11:39 AM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • I highly recommend 2 books by Marti Olsen Laney, Psy.D.:
    1) The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World
    2) The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child: Helping Your Child Thrive in an Extroverted World
    The book explains how introverted people are misunderstood and introversion is considered a handicap because we live in a culture that seems to favor extroverts. It will revolutionize the way you view introverts whether you are one or your child is one. I'd love to hear comments about the book after you read it.

    Answer by maydragon at 6:17 PM on Jul. 1, 2010

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