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Disappointment month after month, how to deal?

My husband and I have been trying for 16 months now. We have had 4 early miscarriages with no answers. I'm officially 3 days late and about 13-15dpo with negative hpts. All of my other times I've been pregnant I've gotten bfp as early as 7dpo, so I would say af is probably on her way. I see a reproductive endocrinologist for the first time next month and I'm very nervous about it. My son will be 3 yrs old this week and I miss having a baby, the breastfeeding, pregnancy etc. How do you deal with the disappointment every month? I've been pretty hopeful and optimistic till now but I don't know how to keep doing this month after month. Especially knowing what's going to be coming up with the specialist.. all the tests, hsg, maybe even IUI if naturally doesn't work... sorry my little vent.. any advice or words of encouragement is appreciated.

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Asked by Anonymous at 5:08 PM on Feb. 21, 2010 in Trying to Conceive

Answers (6)
  • Maybe you should just be thankful you already have a healthy 3 year old, some people can't even have one child..


    Answer by Anonymous at 5:16 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • The only thing I can suggest is letting it happen in God's timing and stop worrying so much. You just have to let it play out and do your best. Im sorry :(

    Answer by lowencope at 5:24 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • Your anxiety is playing tricks with you, try to focus on something else.

    Answer by older at 5:31 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • I am going through the same thing. Yes, you are blessed to have a child already, but that doesn''t mean that it makes wanting a second child any less important. It's called secondary infertility.

    I have a 2.5 year old son who I love beyond words. I am grateful for him through the depths of my soul. However, I long to have another child and give him a sibling too.

    I don't know what to say because I have no answers, but I do understand your feelings. All I can say is do no lose time with the child you have by obsessing about the child you want. I had to do a reality check on my own self.

    Answer by nickat at 10:54 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • Maybe it's the Lords way of telling you to take a break. My friend had 5 miscarriages total, and towards the end of not wanting any only wanting one more, she kept having miscarriages. Finally she is pregnant I and family have been praying for her, for 3 months straight, she is now 6 months along with a healthy little mover haha Alecia Nicole. I had faith in her, don't fear yourself, don't think negative, and put your trust into the Lord because only He will give you his gift to nurture and care for. For some it's easy and others it takes lots of work. Pray and ask for help and give your body a rest. Your wanting something so bad that may not be ready yet. Give yourself timer, and rest. Don't let anyone tell you, you can't have any more. The answer is YES You can! Just maybe not right now, your body needs rest. God Bless You, I hope you conceive all the way up to birth and have many wonderful times with your little one.

    Answer by Hesmynavyman at 2:53 AM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • I fear that SOOOO much. I had my first m/c the end of january and Im anxious to try again just so I don't have to go through all the false hopes

    Answer by Lovebugbaby at 1:35 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

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