Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do you ever get together with friends?

DH and I were talking about how hard it is to find friends. Do you have friends that you get together with? Or should we just be content with each other because good friends are hard to find?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:05 PM on Feb. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Well over the years of us getting married and having babies and all that jazz, we've managed to hold on to one good couple to hang out with. The single, non parent friends kinda got bored and drifted off. I figure its better to have one or two good friends than a ton of fakes

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:10 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • I have a group of girlfriends that I get together with at least every other week or so for dinner, or lunch, or a movie. When our kids were younger we used to plan playground dates together as well. Once a year we all go to the beach for a weekend while our dh's take care of the kids.
    If you're talking about couple friends - that's hard I think to find TWO people who mesh well with you and your dh. My dh and I have one "couple" friend but we don't get together as much because we both have kids and busy lives - and if we all go out together we have to find 2 sitters.
    I think friends complete a need for me that my spouse can't. I can sit and talk to them and they'll just listen where my dh will want to "fix" whatever it is - that's just how guys are. Good friends are difficult to find, and it takes time. You didn't mention your kids ages - but the things they are involved in are usually great places to meet friends.

    Answer by missanc at 9:12 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • No, we have pretty much lost all our friends slowly. After I had gotten laid off, we couldn't afford to do extra fun things and no one wanted to just hang out at our house and play games and watch movies. I was unemployed for 7 months and now that I'm working again, I just don't have time for friends and would rather spend all my extra time with my DD and DH.

    Answer by ABPeterson at 9:12 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • My husband and I have one good set of friends. We met them three years ago when my husband started his current job. Both I and his co workers wife were pregnant so I made my husband be friend them and I am so glad we did. Now are kids get together and we do as well at least once a month. Other then that I am still friends with one gal from high school but we live over an hour away from each other and with full time jobs and a kid it is a lot harder for me to find the time to go hang out with her. I just think you need to be in the right place at the right time.

    Answer by queenfet at 9:12 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • I think it is very important that every married couple have one or two couples with whom they are close. It's good for everyone involved.

    Answer by NannyB. at 9:17 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • I always make time for friends and myself in general. If I didnt I think I would have lost my mind worse then I already have by now.

    Answer by gemgem at 9:23 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • We used to get together with friends and hang out at the house, but since our son was diagnosed with autism at age 3, nobody will baby sit for him, including family. Everyone is scared he'll have a meltdown or something. Obviously, ignorance runs rampant in my family! It's THEIR loss!

    Answer by Robsmommy at 9:27 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • we have a few great friends....we try to keep friends who are like us, married and have children. Single people are okay, but we've had bad experiences where they've tried to make moves on either one of we stick to friends who have the same interests....its great to have good friends..they become like family!

    Answer by LynnB1 at 9:28 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • Finding normal friends as adults can be a challenge when you have a family. From what I've learned, it is RARE to like all members of the other family as well as their parenting styles. Often, I like the wife but can't stand the kid who gets to stay up till 11pm every night. This disrupts my kids sleeping pattern if we get together and I pay the next day with cranky kids. Or, we have couples that have no kids, that is hard for obvious reasons. I have also found it just easier to have a girls' night out, that way I get a break and avoid everyone else and all the drama. Then we pepper in date nights. Anyway, staying home all the time just as a couple gets lonely but having people over can have a downside too. Hard to win here.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 9:59 PM on Feb. 21, 2010

  • My DH and i have slowly lost touch with all our friends. We have kids and most of them don't. When we can we get a sitter and try to go out but it's not the same. The best advice i was given was try to find another couple (or two or three) that has kids about the same age as yours and get together as play dates for the kids and play dates for the grown-ups. It gives the kids time to play and the parents time to talk with other adults (something we all need)

    big smile mini


    Answer by SolaraDarkset at 12:06 AM on Feb. 22, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.