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Is my daughter ready for contacts?

My 11 1/2 year old has had glasses since the 3rd grade. At her yearly eye exam last week, the eye doctor said that she would be old enough for contacts if we want to try them. We did the trail week and she is getting good at putting them in and taking them out. Today is our follow up and I'm for getting them, but my husband thinks she's too young still. I've never gone against his wishes before, but I'm considering it on t his. Our daughter is extremely responsible. She keeps her room pretty clean and has several pets she's in charge of. She spends most of her day reading and is just, over all, a great kid. I don't know what to do on this. I really think she will be very disappointed if she has to go back to the glasses. So, my question is: Is she ready for contacts and do I let her get them or honor my husband’s decision?

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Erin333

Asked by Erin333 at 4:23 PM on Feb. 22, 2010 in General Parenting

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Answers (25)
  • I think that as long as she is wiling to keep it up long tern there is no reason not to allow it. I am sure she is supervise while taking them out and putting them in right? I would get a pair of 'back up' glasses for when she is not feeling up to putting them in like when she is sick and for days when you guys may be running late. I had contacts at 11. OI personally hated them after a few weeks. :0) but that was just me.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:28 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • OH! I do think that you talk to Dh about it again. this would be a really silly thing to get into an argument over. Just explain how you feel and how DD feels and ask hi,m what exactly bothers him about it so that you can attempt to address his concerns.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:29 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • I wouldnt go against is wishes but I would try to convince your hubby that she is ready and you will buy her a box and if she looses them or is irresponsible then she cant get anymore until she is older. Why not give her a chance to prove herself?
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 4:31 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • I would honor her dad's decision. You can speak to him again and plead her case without her knowing, but if you want her to respect his decisions later on, this could be a key issue for her to use against the both of you. Also, if she knows you go against him on this, she will expect you to go against him on other things. I would tell her she has to wear glasses until Daddy says she can have contacts. I have raised three teen-agers, all of whom wore contacts, but they did not get them until Dad said it was okay. I'm telling you this is a very important test for you, more so than for her.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 4:38 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • I've talked to him twice and he won't budge. He thinks she's too young. Her perscription didn't change much, so she can still use her glasses if she wants. He always makes great choices for our family, but I just feel he isn't taking her feelings into account. He's never had to wear glasses or contacts and I have. Our insurance will cover a years supply of contacts and so there would be no cost and she'd have back-ups if she lost one.
    Erin333

    Answer by Erin333 at 4:40 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • I would honor her dad's decision. You can speak to him again and plead her case without her knowing, but if you want her to respect his decisions later on, this could be a key issue for her to use against the both of you. Also, if she knows you go against him on this, she will expect you to go against him on other things. I would tell her she has to wear glasses until Daddy says she can have contacts. I have raised three teen-agers, all of whom wore contacts, but they did not get them until Dad said it was okay. I'm telling you this is a very important test for you, more so than for her.

    Wow! Good point! :0)
    Erin333

    Answer by Erin333 at 4:41 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • Well as somebody who has had bad vision since I was a tiny kid I will tell you the #1 reason why your daughter should start contacts now. Contacts correct vision problems where glasses only assist in seeing better. Since I started wearing contacts my vision has improved greatly, and every eye doctor will tell you the same thing. Contacts correct vision meaning that it will be improved over time glasses do not they just help you see better.
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 4:43 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • have you talked about when he feels it is not to young? Can a compromise be reached such as waiting until summer or next school year? I would try to at least get him to agree to a definite 'date' I do agree with everything Nanny B said as well as far as you not letting DD know that you and dad are at odds on this.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:43 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • So, you all can't sit down as a family and discuss the best option? Dad said no( with no valid reason) and everyone should just clam up until HE decides whether she needs them? Him just saying "she's too young" is a cop out. Is he afraid she will look older, is he afraid for her to grow up? Wow...if the doc thinks so, and she wants them, and she has been very careful with the trial pair. I can't fathom a good reason for her to not get them. Does he also get to decide what pads she is allowed to wear or tampons? Same difference, he has never worn them, how would he know what is best. And "she's too young", when she clearly isn't based on the trial is dumb.
    BradenIsMySon

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 4:47 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

  • Also glasses put more strain on the eye, and can over time cause weak eyed vision problems, the younger a person starts wearing contacts the more likely they are to have greatly improved vision, some people can completely correct their vision if they don't have awful vision. Please tell him he is hurting her chances of having better vision later in life, and that it unfair to hold her back in that way.
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 4:47 PM on Feb. 22, 2010

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