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how do i get my husband and i to sleep on same bed, without my kids forcing themselves on same bed?

I have an eighteen mths old boy who still breastfeed two times a night and a two and half year old daughter that sleep through the nite with me on a queen size bed.

My apartment have only one bedroom. My husband have to sleep on a regular size mattress on the ground, becoz another bed would be too tight to fit.
When i try sleeping with my husband on the ground the kids would somehow sense i am not around them and would come to sleep with us too, which makes us all uncomfortable.
I would still have to leave him and go put them on their bed and sleep together.

It's making my husband and i become more distance, and loosing interest on sex.



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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:46 PM on Feb. 23, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Can you get a bigger unit? It's really gross to have sex with your kids in the room....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:50 PM on Feb. 23, 2010

  • So you have sex in the same room your children are sleeping in? IMO that's wrong in so many ways... If I were you I would put a bed in the living room, and your little ones in the room together on the double bed. Make that a space for them only and you could split your living room in half, one side a place for the bed, and the other half for the Couch, and TV etc, for you and your hubby. GL... Sorry if my answer seemed harsh.
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 8:54 PM on Feb. 23, 2010

  • Have the kids sleep in the livingroom or have you and hubby sleep in the livingroom. It will take a little getting used to for the kids, but if you're marriage and sex life are suffering, then you should do something about it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:54 PM on Feb. 23, 2010

  • I agree with you and dh sleeping on a pull out couch or some type of bed in the living room and let the kids have the bedroom. At 18 months, there's no physical need for nighttime feedings - maybe you can try to cut those out. The best gift you can give your kids is for their parents to have a strong marriage.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:10 PM on Feb. 23, 2010

  • There is a great article on drjaygordon.com on transitioning kids from the family bed. It'll help.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 9:11 PM on Feb. 23, 2010

  • keep putting your kids back in their beds. I share a room with DS and when my BF comes over for the night, its hard cuz DS is so used to just sleeping with me. He now has a twin size and I have a queen size, but since I got this bed, he knows that he's not allowed on it unless i give him permission (i plan on doing it when i get a bigger place-- he's not allowed in my room unless permission is given).

    it'll take time, especially since they are so used to it.. they'll fight it as hard as they can, but if you are consistant, and firm- it'll work out in the end.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:36 AM on Feb. 24, 2010

  • ohh! is it possible to also have a night away from the kids- you and DH get a hotel room for the night and reconnect with each other?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:36 AM on Feb. 24, 2010

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