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Do I say something, if so; What?

I have a friend who lives 7 blocks from her son's school. The thing is it's been snowing a lot these last few wks ( we've had at least 3 blizzards thus far & are in the middle of another). Her son only goes to school for 3 1/2 hrs, she also has a younger son & a baby girl. Everytime she's taken him to school or picked him up (she has to walk) she falls or 1 of her kids do or something happens. But she's intent on taking her son to school (with the 2 smaller 1s in toe) in the middle of a blizzard to get rid of him for 3 1/2hrs. She says she "needs a break from the boys fighting". I want to tell her it would probably be easier just to dicsiplan her kids (I don't mean hit, I mean educate them in how to behave with each other). She's got dozens of child psychology degrees & refuses to teach her own kids how to behave in her own home. My thing is I'm worried for her kids, everytime they go out they get hurt. Do I say something?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:42 PM on Feb. 25, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (64)
  • I would. She could serously hurt herself of one of the kids.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:45 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • Hurt? How by falling? Kids fall. Are they getting broken bones everytime they fall? Or gashes and bleeding profusely??

    Really? It sounds minor. If her child is in school/daycare and she's paying it... she has every right to send him... Besides, the kids probably enjoy the snow anyway.


    Answer by LyTe684 at 12:45 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • If you say anything then say "Do you want me to take him to school you seem to have your hands full."It doesnt matter that she is sending her kid to school just to have a break. Its now apart of his routine. If there was a way to take him to school and not bring out her other children then im sure she would have found it already. So, unless you offer to take her son to school, I dont think you should say anything.

    Answer by armywife2009101 at 12:46 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • no. god forbid they walk 7 blocks. it isnt going to kill them. and if those 3 hours help her... then who cares. it isnt like she is dropping him just anywhere... she is taking him to SCHOOL! They teach things there as well. 7 blocks really isnt all that far. and 3 1/2 hours goes quick. i think it is good for her and her son.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:46 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • Nah! Every home is different and each child is different! Maybe she really does need the break! After all she has three kids! I would go crazy with three! What you could do though is maybe offer to give her a ride! If I were concerned for the safety of the kiddos and her I would try to help out that way instead of questioning her parenting skills. She may get offended and still walk them to school anyway! I always try to help in the positive and try to stay as far away from the negative as possible!

    Answer by cgonzales542 at 12:49 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • Maybe offer a solution instead of pointing out the problem you might see. She might actually like to get out of the house with that many LO's. Offer to help her out if you see it as a problem, if you can't then I don't really feel it's your place to say anything. JMO

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 12:50 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • You must only have one child OP. I have FIVE. And they are well behaved children...outside of our home. Everyone compliments me but at home, wow they fight like there's no tomorrow...and I intervene & sometimes I just let them hash it out but, yes at times I do need a break from the constant battles. "Educate" on how to behave with each other....sounds all nice & clinical. Do you know how many times a day I say "Your sister doesnt like you to do that. How would you feel if she did that to you? Sad? Ok, well it makes HER sad when you grab a toy she is playing with. Let her play for a minute then it will be your turn. Or maybe you can play something together nicely like this puzzle. Let's find a nice puzzle that we can help each other with". Yeah, see I know exactly how to "educate"..then they work on the puzzle for 2 min. & then someone screams & someone starts crying...and you get the idea. It doesnt always work. (con't)

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:53 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • (con't) sometimes kids need a break from each other too! Give the poor woman a break! Like someone else said, its school. He gets to play & interact with other children & learn better how to share with others. Which in turn, may help how he behaves with his siblings at home. I WISH I could afford to send my little ones to pre-school. But I can't. Good for her!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:55 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • I have 3 of my own & am 8months pregnant I can't offer her any help w/out putting my own kids in our van and going the 40min.s in this blizzard to take her son to school (it's free daycare at shcool she doesn't pay for it). I guess I was asking because of how bad the blizzard is, that she wasn't even sure the shcool was open she was just going to go to check. The falls are pretty bad she's the one that complains about them, the puddles,the ice, the kids crying thw whole way there. I wouldn't even know about it if it weren't for her complaining about it. But as you all have mentioned she must need it. I was just concerned with her children who have asked her (2 oldest) to please not go because they hate getting all wet & falling on the ice. Giving her a solution to me would be telling her she should try teaching her kids how to behave w/ each other so she wouldn't always feel she "needs to get away from them". But that''s me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:01 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • I'm not sure, op, what you mean that one of that family's kids or mom is always getting hurt? Exactly hurt how, by slipping in the snow when walking through snow, snowstorms?

    Like a pp asked, why don't You offer to watch her littler ones so she can get her older son.

    When's the last time you regularly walked x days a week through snow with two little kids one way and three little kids another way?

    I have three kids, grown so they fight less but they still fight. And the younger kids are as siblings the more they fight.

    offer to help the mom for goodness sake.

    Answer by lfl at 1:01 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

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