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How do i tell him i want a second child!?? :-/

well... i am wat you would call a young mom and a young wife. Often when i tell ppl, they look at me like wow! I love love love being a mommy to my 10 month old baby girl! We have sooo much fun together! But i find myself lately wanting another child! wat to do , wat to do! i want another baby already but how do i tell my husband?? I know that financially it will be harder but hey we did it with the first and she was unexpected so im positive we will find a way to do it with the second. Where theres a will, theres a way! I guess i am just afraid of what he will say or maybe i will be surprised and he will say that he want a second baby too! I am also torn because i want to focus on my first born and give her all the attention she needs. How long did you wait to have a second child and was it planned or by "accident" and how did you manage after with two kids? How is it adjusting?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:51 PM on Feb. 25, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (9)
  • deciding to have a baby is one that needs to be taken heavily. and needs to be condoned by both partners, just simple say hey i wanted to run something by you. u never know maybe hes wanting one too. or maybe u guys can decide on when would be a good time.
    i had my first baby when i was 19. i was a single mom but when i got married dh wanted a baby of his own. my oldest was 2 when we found out we were preggers again.

    **currently 23 waiting on baby number 3 **
    sandraberke

    Answer by sandraberke at 2:55 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • My first child wasn't planned, but we were excited about her, at about 11 months old i started wanting another child and would talk to my husband about when we should have another child and he wanted to wait a bit. Well almost a month after our daughter turned one he finally said yes. "Why not" so when he came back from being underway we started TTC, it actually took 8 months before we became pregnant again. i am now due in 11 days wiht our second girl and they will be almost 2 1/2 years apart. The best thing you can do is just talk to him and ask him how he feels about having another child.
    kanakake

    Answer by kanakake at 3:00 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • Well for me I got pregnant with my 2nd at 18. My first was only 6mths! So when my 2nd was born, my first was 15mths old. We did fine, I mean really fine. But our 2nd died from undetermined causes, though I am now pregnant with my 3rd and I'm excited :D If you believe you can manage two kids, talk to your husband and consider every option.
    dcorona89

    Answer by dcorona89 at 3:09 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • I had my daughter at 15 and she is almost 2 now.
    I would not consider having another for a while because I dont want her to feel like she isnt my number one. I also am still in school. I would suggest you waiting until your first no longer needs a bottle or diapers. That will help you and your hubby keep some peace and give the first child all of the attention she needs to overcome those obstacles. I dont know if you are religious but as a Christian it has always helped me to pray about such huge decisions. Pray about it?
    God Bless.
    amber710

    Answer by amber710 at 3:16 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • This is one of those "before marriage" conversations...did the two of you talk about it before getting married? What did he say then?

    If you DIDN'T discuss it, then I'd go with the direct approach. "I want another baby." And then you can discuss the pros and cons.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 3:26 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • gdiamante

    you really cant plan all of your children before you get married and know exactly when the right time is, before that time has even came...dont ya think??
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:30 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • Just ask, then you know. Never trick a man with pregnancy, it is so unfair to take that choice away, Never a good idea. There is no rush on it though, I know you want another, but that feeling will still be there in another year. Your little girl is still tiny really, and there is so much ahead for you with her. Try to not rush... I had my first 3 young, and I loved it but... By the time I was 25 my DH said no more, so all the baby bit was over... and that was hard, to be young, with lots of friends just starting and me already past that stage.Enjoy where you are at, ask him and go for there.
    myheartx4

    Answer by myheartx4 at 3:42 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • I may not really answer you rquestion. You said it was hard having her financially. Why would you want to do that to him again. Maybe later. WHAT ARE YOU DOING FOR YOURSELF? Oneday you will wake up and wish you had done something more, than be a mommy. Love her and prepare yourself for another child, by investing in yourself. You'd be alot happier with another baby if you do. It is just my experience and my opinion. Good luck.
    Godswk

    Answer by Godswk at 7:59 PM on Feb. 25, 2010

  • I havent had this problem my husband is all ready and excited about another child. I am not ready for it but it does mean guys can be ready too. Just talk to your husband and ask when he thinks a good time would be, then say what you think and then meet in the middle.
    Newmommys101

    Answer by Newmommys101 at 1:22 AM on Feb. 26, 2010

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