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Problems w/ my 6 yr old DD wetting and pooping in pants....HELP!

My DD is 6 yr old and she continues to pee and poop in her pants. I can't figure out what to do...I've tried everything I can think of...took her to Dr. to see if it was a bladder problem, it wasn't, grounded, I've sat down and talked to her to see if anything was going on...I just can't figure it out! It's become a major issue at school. She has had an "accident" 3 out of the 4 days at school this week. It has become a major problem there. I've spoke to them on the phone about it, now they want me to come and meet with them about it. They told me they were at their wits end with her, but so am I. I don't know what they want from me, as I have tried EVERYTHING I can think of. I can't figure out why she would want to do this. Any advice would be great. Thanks!

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:22 AM on Feb. 26, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (9)
  • Make her clean them herself every time she does it. She'll get sick of that pretty quick. I know it's gross, but if you've tried everything else...

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:25 AM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • Just take something away from her that she really liks like a favorit toys or whatever and tell her that it every time she dos it that is what is going to happin and see if that helps and do not give them back to her till she stops and if she dos stop and u give them back and she starts doin it agin take all of them away and tell her u gave the to a lil girl that uses the pottey a lil white lie never hurts

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:52 AM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • At six you are no longer talking about potty training issues she is old enough to know to use the toilet and is choosing not to. Its time for therapy. There is some hidden psychological problem thats causing her to do this. Maybe she hates school and knows if she poops her pants you'll have to come bring her new clothes and she misses you wants to see you. Maybe she is scared of the bathroom at school or embarrased for other kids to hear the sounds from her pooping or peeing. Maybe, and I'm not accusing or suggesting, but it is a sign of sexual abuse when older children do this. I think its important that you get her in therapy and find out what the real issue is and fix it now. Trust me the other kids are going to ridicule her. I still remember a kid who pooped his pants every day in the first grade we all called him Bradley poopoo pants. The name stuck through, well now. Help her and get this issue solved. Good luck.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:18 AM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • I agree with 18Anon - At age 6 this is no longer a phyiscal control problem. It is an emotional issue and you need to get her in to talk to someone.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:22 AM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • My 7 yr old son had been doing this for over a year. I took him to the pediatrician, they did a urine test and said that his bladder was fine. I tried making him clean up the messes, being supportive & having long talks with him (thinking it may have been emotional), having the school nurse & the guidance counselor talk with him & meet with him weekly for a few months, I even took him to a different pediatrician for a second opinion. Nothing worked... until I asked the pediatrician what kind of specialist deals with these things. She told me that a pediatric gastro-enterologist was all there was. I took him to one despite her opinion. With an abdominal exam and a few questions, he had an actual diagnosis (Encopresis) in less than 15 minutes at AI Dupont in Wilmington, DE. We've been treating him now (without prescriptions, by the way) for about 2 weeks, and he's already feeling better and making enormous progress!

    Answer by BTokash at 4:24 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • I thought the same thing as a few of these answers, that there must be something emotional going on with him that was causing this. It is NOT the problem. Encopresis is a condition that causes the child to not know they are having an "accident". They can't feel it, and they can't control it. The embarrassment and shame that they experience when they realize what they did stops them from feeling comfortable telling someone or talking about it. Also, when you look up Encopresis (and I'm sure you all will), even thought is is a problem with the bowel, it puts pressure on the bladder, causing the urine "accidents" also. My son hasn't had a single urine accident since the day we started treatment! The #2 accidents are getting better, but it takes a few months for the bowel to completely recover, so treatment takes a while. Good luck with your daughter, and keep your chin up. I know how frustrating it is!

    Answer by BTokash at 4:34 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • Thanks everybody. I have sat down with her a several times and asked her if anything was going on, that she could tell me anything, etc. She always tells me no. I am almost myself wondering if it isn't an issue about school. We were having alot of problems with them and last school year, we had had enough. We transferred the kids to the school a couple miles away, stayed at the in-laws, and was going to sell our house here. While in the other school all our kids were thriving, she did have a couple of accidents, but I could count on one hand how many. Well, we didn't have any luck with the sell, and at the beginning of the year, we had to transfer the kids back to this school. Since then the accidents are almost daily and she is always telling me how she wants to go back to her other school b/c it was so much better. So that has me thinking. On the plus side, it didn't happen today:)

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:38 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • From what you are saying it sounds like a emotional thing. Good Luck

    Answer by IMAMOM2-2KIDS at 5:06 AM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • Hmmmmm.....It sounds emotional, but I wouldn't stop there. How long has she been having accidents? Was she accident-free over the summer? If she was, I'd say it was the stress from her school. If she still had accidents ove the summer, there may be another component here. Perhaps she had accidents during the school year and was being harrassed about it from the kids there and she wants a fresh start in another school. It will happen there too though if the accidents don't stop first. You might want to try eliminating all forms of dairy from her diet for 2 weeks and see if that helps.

    Answer by oregonmom22 at 11:31 PM on Aug. 8, 2010

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