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Does anyone have a clue as to why a child follows bad behavior of another child? A kid pokes my kid and my kid pokes him back. Is it pure impulsivity or do they 'get something out of it'? Dr. Phil always says 'there is a payoff for everything we do' What is the payoff ? What can you do to stop this behavior? We've tried everything it seems.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:43 AM on Feb. 26, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (3)
  • Children imitate what they see. If he is doing something you don't want him to do, then correct his behavior. Quit watching Dr Phil. He'll have you over-analyzing your child.

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 8:52 AM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • A child is born being all about himself. He learns as a little baby how he can manipulate people into getting what he wants, and he is totally centered on himself and on getting his needs met. He has to consistently be taught that he cannot always have what he wants or do whatever he feels like doing. Even when he is taught, he will still sometimes instinctively punch back. Gaining self-control is hard. There are plenty of adults who still have not mastered it. As his mom, you must always be teaching what is and is not acceptable behavior. Then you must choose a way to reinforce the lessons. There used to be a book around entitled PARENTING ISN'T FOR COWARDS. Truer words were never spoken!

    Answer by NannyB. at 9:05 AM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • What you get out of it is power and false confidence that you have something over that child.
    To stop it you encourage better behaviour. You just let him know that what he's doing doesn't benefit him and hurts the other child. You can try a reward system for good behaviour or grounding if just talking doesn't work.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 10:16 AM on Feb. 26, 2010

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