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stressed OUT!

I am due in 9 days. I have a 2 1/2 year old son already and am starting to freak out a LOT!!! I am afraid that I will not be able to share my love equally between my two children. Also, I fear that I will miss the relationship that my son and I have together.
I cannot sleep because I am so preoccupied. I find myself being short tempered with my little boy for no reason except for my sleepiness and worry. Any advice, personal stories, etc. are greatly appreciated. Thank you!

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Asked by Anonymous at 2:56 PM on Feb. 26, 2010 in Pregnancy

Answers (5)
  • Guess what? This is soooooo normal. The end of a pregnancy causes all kinds of freak outs on its own and having another LO to worry about makes it worse. You will be so surprised at how able you are to love both of them equally, and still find ways to spend time with your older one. You may even see a closer relationship because he will really value your attention when he has to share it. You will be just fine, those hormones are making you nuts. Just take a deep breath drink some chamomile tea, and take a hot bath before bed to see if that helps. Also before bed you can journal all of your thoughts and feelings, that way they are in a way dealt with so you can sleep. Good luck, and congrats.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 3:00 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • You don't have to share your love equally. You will have love for each child. If you are normal there will be times you love one more than the other. It may change from day to day or year to year.

    Adding worry to the situation does not help. Practice the relaxation techniques you learned in childbirth class. Meditation can really help. You can learn to benefit from as little as a few minutes of meditation at a time.

    Answer by Gailll at 3:06 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • i worry about the same things. my son is 2.5 and i'm 23 weeks pregnant. i was more stressed about it in the first trimester than now. sooo i think it's because you are pregnant, possibly uncomfortable, having a hard time sleeping, and contemplating a big life change =) it is STRESSFUL! but everything will work out great, i bet =)

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:31 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • What Gailll said, plus just 2 months ago I had my 3rd baby. I have a 3.5 year old, 22 month old, and a 2 month that's stress. When I had the 20 month old and new baby it wasn't so bad it was having the 3rd in less than 4 years that made things really difficult. I now look back on the days with the 1 toddler and baby like it was a quiet and relaxing time compared with my situation now. I must admit, I'm going gray at an alarming rate.

    Get yourself a wrap so that you can easily wear your baby. It's much easier to keep a handle on your toddler when your hands are free. I say wrap instead of sling or carrier (I've had all 3) because they are easily adjusted and much more comfortable. Also, breastfeed. It's so much easier to whip out a breast and feed the baby when ever than to deal with a baby and toddler and cleaning bottles and mixing formula.

    Answer by ThrivingMom at 3:36 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • Try to surrender to Life, to the Bigger Picture, that time and Nature always works itself out. You will have plenty of love for everyone and you will discover ways to spend time with them-- showing your love.
    Right now, try to let go, to rest, to look for ways to enjoy this time. Things WILL be okay-- some days harder than others, some days purely DIVINE!

    The very beginning is really hard... but the less dependent they become with maturity, they more you can breathe and find special ways to nurture them.

    Good luck!

    Answer by doulala at 4:22 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

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