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When did you tell your kids about sex?

I was reading another question on here about a mom buying condoms w/her 11 year old with her. I guess I'm nieve, but I was a little surprised by the comments. 11 years old is still elementary school - and they are talking about sex???
Lord help me! LOL
Please don't answer with its not one convo it's an on going thing...I get that - but WHEN, WHAT AGE do you/did you have the initial sex talk. Explaine what sex is ect?

Answer Question

Asked by mommymeg03 at 9:28 PM on Feb. 26, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 13 (1,235 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • I was in middle school at 10 so it's really about the maturity of the child. My oldest dd was pregnant at 13 so obviously I waited too long. It's not so bad that that mom you mentioned showed she was a responsible mom regarding sex. Teaching her about safe sex is a good idea, even at 11. The dr who deliverer my grandson said he delivered a baby to a girl age 9. It's never too early to teach them what they are mature enough to understand.

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:32 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • I'm not questioning anyones teachings to their child - I was just caught off faurd by some of the responces - I guess I hadn't realized how young...... I am a single mom of a 6 year old boy, and did not have a good model of things growing up so I am truely clueless as to what and when to have thees convos

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 9:38 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • My nephew is 7 and can tell you the basics. It is necessary to introduce the basics of sex early these days. Being a substitute teacher, I have seen pregnant middle school girls. There was actually a girl in the 5th grade pregnant in my area a few years back. Children are being introduced to these types of things so early in life now a days. It is sad but as mother's we need to start preparing our children for the world at a young age. Of course at 6,7,8 years old they don't need to know details but at least sex is between a man and a woman, it makes a baby, if you don't want a baby don't do it, maybe start talking about protection. It is really up to the parent but I believe it is better for a child to learn from a parent then from their classmates.

    Answer by imamommmmyyy at 9:43 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • I sooooo agree I want him to hear from me, not classmates, again - I am jsut clueless
    I really though I had a few more years to think about this (and hope that a man would come along that could help me out with this)

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 9:48 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • I think that you need to 3tart talking to them early becau3e you' d be 3upri3ed I you knew what they were learning from friend3 tv and magazine3. I ju3t wouldn't want my dd to only view of it to be from tho3e 3ource3. Not trying to ba3h that'3 ju3t my view.

    Answer by Liz132 at 9:53 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • Well to start you may just want to tell him the most basic things. To make a baby it takes a boy and a girl that love each other..At that point he will most likely start asking questions. Let him do the asking and just answer the questions honestly but carefully (no scary words or details). When he stops asking questions leave it alone. You can wait a few weeks and bring it up casually again. This is what we did with my nephew and he had new questions each time. He is 7 and now knows that boys and girls have different parts, they need to be alone to make a baby, they need to love each other, he knows about labor and how much it hurts the mom and where the baby comes out.

    The best advice I could give is to start the conversation and let him run with it. This way you know you aren't giving to much information and he will grow up knowing he can ask you anything.

    Good luck!

    Answer by imamommmmyyy at 9:56 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • I guess my daughter was about 6. She saw something on tv, and asked what it was. So I told her. She wasn't shy about it. I didn't elaborate. But as she gets older, she asks questions. I have told her to not talk about it at school, or with other kids. I don't just let her watch shows with sex, but sometimes they happen to see things on tv. I'm not going to be shy about it. I answered that other post, the one you mentioned. If you are uncomfortable, they will be. Then they will not come to you with questions. If you don't want your kids to get the wrong information, then you need to put your discomfort aside and talk with them.

    Answer by Raine2001 at 11:09 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • It is an ongoing conversation (I know you didn't want that as an answer) and for every kid the time they learn the mechanics will differ. My son at 7 knows the basics he asked we told him the truth in the best way we could for his age. He processed it let us know he would never be doing that and for a couple days gave his dad the evil eye. We did not get graphic but he knows the basics. As he gets older and asks more questions we will simply answer them. My husband never had a big talk when he was a teen over time he learned what he needed to know from his dad through many conversations. I think you wait until 13-14 you are way too late and they are already being given bad information by friends.  My parents never really talked to me about sex.  I had a wonderful aunt who did or I would have been clueless or only knew what my friends were telling me about it. 


    Answer by momtolucas2002 at 11:59 PM on Feb. 26, 2010

  • This should not be one conversation; this should be a series of conversations, starting practically at birth, beginning with teaching children the proper name for body parts and their functions.
    You should always be on the lookout for teachable moments: a pregant friend or relative, a new litter of puppies, etc.
    If you treat sex as a normal part of life, and fully educate your child, your child will be less likely to become a parent before he/she is ready (or pick up a deadly disease)

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:47 AM on Feb. 27, 2010

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