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I am at a loss.......

My cousin just lost her 5 yr old. He got the stomach bug that is going around and he got sick in the middle of the night. He aspirated it and was taken to the hosp. He didnt make it. omg. I cant even FATHOM what she going through. Is there anything I can or should do? I just want to help but that may be the LAST thing she would want. She has 2 other children. One older, one younger. I just dont know. Please any advice is welcome!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:47 PM on Feb. 27, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Offer to watch her other two while she grieves and processes what happened.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:50 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • You just tell her if she needs anything just ask. Tell her you are soory for her loss.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 4:50 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • wow, I don't know what to say except that I'm so so so so sorry for the loss of your cousin's little boy. The best advice I can give is to just let her know that she isn't alone and that you're there for her if she needs anythings. Check up on her to make sure she's holding up well enough to take care of the other two. She may need help. I can't even imagine the pain she's experiencing
    nicolemstacy

    Answer by nicolemstacy at 4:51 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • I would just let her know that you're there for her to help in any way possible. Whether that be babysitting, making meals, cleaning, etc. Maybe helping with the funeral/memorial. Whatever will help her grieve best. But don't be too pushy. Just knowing that you're there and care about her might just be what she needs at the moment.

    I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine what she's going through. We're here for all of you. Good luck.
    AmberBrat

    Answer by AmberBrat at 4:53 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • Right now she's going to be so busy making preperations and getting everything in order, it usually doesn't hit you full force till the funeral and that's when it really hits, and everyone is around to comfort you but later, everyone goes away and assumes you're fine... that's when she's going to need you more than ever. So just offer her your shoulder, your hand and your heart and I can't speak for everyone, but for me, it was after the funeral it seemed no one mentioned her name anymore, it was like she never existed (mine was stillborn, not a child everyone had a relationship with so it is different), so my advice is to hug her, tell her that you know she's in shock and grieving now but whether it's now, tomorrow or 10 years from now you'll be there for her and actually mean it.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 5:38 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • Op~ Thak yall so much. All of that makes great sense! My whole family is just reeling that I knew calmer heads would actually make sense right now.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:08 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • I feel, she is just numb, at the moment....

    It has probley, not really hit her ...YET.

    After, the funeral, and people go on with thier lives...

    That is when, she is going to REALLY NEED YOU...

    JUST LOVE HER, and CRY with her, do not ask....
    .
    Just clean what needs cleaned, if you want to, she maybe, afraid to ask you for help.♥♥♥♥♥♥
    SissyAnn141

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 10:01 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

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