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Absent partent that wants summer visit

My ex has not had over-nite visitation with our kids sense Jan '09. He has not called and/or sent any communication to the kids.
What are my right if all of a sudden, he's moved out of state and wants the kids for the summer?
I've talked to the kids ages 9 and 11. They've said they'd like to get to know him again. Like have a day visit for awhile, then work into over-nights. This would be diffucult if he's moved out of state. We're talking TX to TN. (last I heard, he was in TN or GA)
I was just wonding what legal rights the kids or I have - I know and understand, that he has a right to visitation, but he's like a stranger to the kids after all this time.
To me it would have beed different if he's at least kept in contact with the kids, calling once a week or something. But nothing like has happened.
I don't feel comfortable putting my kids on a plane to another state to someone they don't feel comfortable being with.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:28 PM on Feb. 27, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • they are stll a little yong to have a legal say. I agree with you they need reaquantance time and you do have a leg to stand on esp. since you don't know where he lives exactly...
    Is he just blowing air or is he serious? What is the last LEGAL visitation plan...
    I'd revisit it... look at it he state etc. and go from there. I would demand a LEGAL court plan and I would ask for reaquantance time.
    Good luck
    MamiJaAyla

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 6:48 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • If you choose to go this route, you and the other parent should be as specific as you can to avoid future conflicts. Who has legal custody? Which holiday does the child spend with you? What time and where may the other parent pick the child up? What time should the child be returned home? What is the procedure to follow if either of you are running late and won't be there on time? How much notice should you be given if they are planning a vacation? How far away may the other spouse move? What you might think you can figure out as you go along could actually blow up into a full scale war later. The Stipulations should state everything that you have agreed upon. You should not rely on any oral promises. If you both agreed on it, write it down (no matter how trivial it may seem now).
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:31 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • you have GOT to go to court and get your rights defined. if he currently has visitation that includes summer visits. you are SOL without having a review in court on the agreement.
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 5:37 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • we've been divorced sense 2002 - he has had visitation on and off through out the years, depends on what his current girl friends at the time wanted and if she cared about kids or not. So, I need to back to an attorney to have visitation revised. Right now our papers state that he'd have to come pick up the kids from my door-step and return them to my door-step.
    Do the kids not have a right to say if they want to go or not?
    What about school activities and/or sports they'll start soon.
    I dought, at this point he'll be able to afford to come get them and bring them back, ect.. BUT I want to be prepaired and have talked to the kids about what they've thoguht and wanted.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:44 PM on Feb. 27, 2010

  • Kids rarely get a say in the parents right to visitation, and even if the courts listened they would still do whatever was necassary to maintain the parent child bond...sad really, and yet I do understand it. I would talk to a lawer and see what he has to say.
    luckysevenwow

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 6:02 PM on Feb. 27, 2010