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I don't know what to do.

I can tell when men fall into or out of love with me. And he doesn't love me anymore. We have only been married a year. And I thought we were happy. He's drifting so far away. He’s been so mean the past few weeks, with little comments here or there. Exhibit A: I'm going to go to Hooters and find her a Mommy who can breastfeed her. (He said he was "only joking", and "why can't I take a joke?")
He quit his job. His first job in 6 months, he worked 1 day and quit it. Even after he promised me he would give it a week.
On our anniversary, he took me out, we went to the drive-in, and even after I put my hand in his, he wouldn't hold my hand. Then later when we got busy with the anniversary night stuff, he did not say I love you until I said it to him. And then it was mostly mumbled.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:40 AM on Mar. 1, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • CONTINUED:
    He called our beautiful little baby girl a pain in the ass when I told him that I was tired and wanted to sleep, so he should get up from his 9 hour nap and rock her to sleep. Then I told him that he WILL NOT speak about my kid in that way. He told me to shut up. Then I said he WILL NOT speak to me like that and he will NEVER talk about my kid like that. Then I rolled over and went to sleep. He hasn't hugged me or kissed me in 2 days.
    He wasn't like this when we got married. He was sweet and he catered to my every whim. He was completely mine. It was about the time I was hospitalized on my 37th week for preeclampsia, that he became more and more distant. It wasn't until about a week ago that I just felt completely unloved. I tried talking to him but he just blew me off. Said he didn't mean to be an ass. But he hasn't tried to change either. I'm just so lost. I'm angry, and hurt. And I don't know what to do.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:41 AM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • He called our beautiful little baby girl a pain in the ass when I told him that I was tired and wanted to sleep, so he should get up from his 9 hour nap and rock her to sleep. Then I told him that he WILL NOT speak about my kid in that way. He told me to shut up. Then I said he WILL NOT speak to me like that and he will NEVER talk about my kid like that. Then I rolled over and went to sleep. He hasn't hugged me or kissed me in 2 days.
    He wasn't like this when we got married. He was sweet and he catered to my every whim. He was completely mine. It was about the time I was hospitalized on my 37th week for preeclampsia, that he became more and more distant. It wasn't until about a week ago that I just felt completely unloved. I tried talking to him but he just blew me off. Said he didn't mean to be an ass. But he hasn't tried to change either. I'm just so lost. I'm angry, and hurt. And I don't know what to do.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:49 AM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • sounds like your man is stressed out, not that he doesn't love you. How about you ask him if he is stressed when he says things like that.. or ask him if somethings wrong? You'd be surprised what may be really going on.

    soonmommyof3

    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 5:50 AM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • honey, does he suffer from depression? it sounds a bit like that to me. i really would suggest some marriage counceling. he might have pulled away out of depression, maybe fear? its hard to know. but it sounds like you guys need some help
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 5:50 AM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • OP: I will try again to talk to him, He was diagnosed with depression as teenager. We don't have money for a conselor. But, I can try to see what's wrong.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:01 AM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • can you and he get any state insurance? check also in the town you live in , many places have sliding scale therapy and psych coverage for low income families. also try salvation army red shield clinic, if you have a salvation army in your area and they have a clinic. they can likely help too
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 6:05 AM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • OP: I will look into it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:24 AM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • i will be thinking of you!! send me a pm would you? if you wish. i hope that you can find some help
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 6:28 AM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • How old are you all? It sound to me like he is imiture. Most men do not say I love you a lot. Or are huggy, kissy. Sounnd to me you to are going thew the "new baby " time. That is always stressful.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 7:20 AM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • I agree with louise, sounds like "new baby" stress to me. My husband was like that for almost a year after our son was born.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:49 AM on Mar. 1, 2010

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