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would you feel bad for her husband?

i know this couple and they arent married but have 2 children together. one toddler and one infant. he works she is a sahm. now i am a sahm as well, and i admit a "clean freak" however to me a sahm should have meals ready for the family and keep a clean home. her home is a diaster area. i wont go into too much detail but its filthy.she saidshe hates cleaning.well, dirty diapers laid wherever ou change the baby and bugs everywhere in your home isa little much.anyways, her dh works hard and recently has said he knows he'd be better off w/o her but she wont have anywhere to go.


Asked by Anonymous at 3:53 PM on Mar. 1, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • yeah, i have to agree with a SAHM of two girls and my fiancee has worked the same job for 4 years..he hates it and gets treated like crap. but he makes excellent money and he knows we would drown without i don't ask him to do much around the house because i am home with the kids, so whats stopping me from doing it? i am kind of a 50's mom cause i love to take care of my 21 and i love it...i love taking care of my times i hate cleaning the house but its gotta be done...

    Answer by mom_on_strike at 4:02 PM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • Sounds like cps might be intervening sometime in their lives. Bugs should not be surrounding children.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:55 PM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • I am a sahm and I will admit sometimes my house is a mess but I know when it's a mess and get on it asap. As for the bugs sometimes people can't help it. My apartment has roaches and they will not go away. bombed and put boric acid under baseboards. They are really hard to get rid of but they were here when I moved in. As for the diapers everywhere eeew. Sounds like she needs to see a dr and get depression meds. There is no other reason for her house to b that way.

    Answer by Peekalou at 4:03 PM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • You know I hate to be mean, but what business of it is yours? If you run your home the way you like to run it, why should she run it the same way you do, because of what you believe? It's mean to look down on others and it causes others pain when you place your beliefs and lifestyles on them. I dont like dirty diapers myself, but honestly consentraite on your own home, leave the poor man alone it kind of makes you look like a permiscuous woman by going over and gloating, and yes saying that the food should be on the table when your man gets home, it is gloating. Nobody deserves to constantly be compared to another.

    Answer by FullMoonAngel at 4:05 PM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • My house is sometimes dirty, not ever filthy! If there are bugs in her i suggest he talks to her and tells her look its ok for toys to be everywhere but its not ok for diapers to be everywhere and BUGS! common no mother wants that around her children!

    Answer by MaddysMommy7208 at 4:11 PM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • Just wondering how you know that "her dh works hard and recently has said he knows he'd be better off w/o her but she wont have anywhere to go"? Are you having private convo's w/ this woman's SO? If you are, you are being very inappropriate and putiing yourself in someone else's business. I have to wonder what your motive is. Are you just trying to get him for yourself?

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:13 PM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • OP..this man is my dh's friend. he tells my dh these things. true maybe i should mind my own but when you go over there and see a bugs crawlingall over the floor where her baby crawls then you do tend to feel bad for the man. espeacially when he feels embarassed to even let you in the home due to the mess. and yes i run my home a certain way but i think pushing cleanliness on another isnt a bad thing.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:35 PM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • I don't feel bad for people who refuse to change a bad situation. Instead of bashing his wife to his buddies and their wives, he needs to help her. She sounds depressed. He should bring this up with her. Shame on the three of you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:47 PM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • Well aren't you the perfect wife and mother, get over yourself!!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:48 PM on Mar. 1, 2010

  • yes, i guess i am the perfect wife and mother! thank you!

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:14 PM on Mar. 1, 2010