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I really need some help! I just dont know what to do anymore! Please!

Ok first of all my son is 3 and a half will be 4 this summer. We are on week 3 of "hell" i just dont know whats going on. He doesnt listen, he throws fits all the time, he talks back, hes mean to his 8 month old brother, its just not him!! I want to help him and figure out why hes acting like this so we can make changes. I feel like a bad mom, that im not giving him what he needs. I thought maybe some jelousy was setting in so 2 weekends ago when we were going to a cabin i let him go to his grandmas by himself and sent the baby to a different sitter so he could get some one on one time. I sit and play with him by himself, just the other day he spend the whole day with just his dad, thats the other thing, he asks when dads gonna be home in the morning already and he always whines he wants dad. Does he really need more one on one time and then this will get better? is he striving for something else? Is this just part of being 3?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:01 AM on Mar. 2, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (8)
  • For some reason often children at this age are little turds. And honeslty, it is common for a child to ask where their working parent is at that age., When I keep my nephew he will do this wanting his mommy. Age 3 is normally the age children are trying to figure things out and ask 1001 questions all the while wanting to make you pull your hair out. Many do outgrow this by age 4 though. Good luck momma, and it does take patience but it is so worth it :) Hugs!

    Answer by ronjwake at 10:10 AM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • Maybe ds is ready for preschool? or more physical play - a gym class? A bicycle a couple of times around the block each day or indoor bowling? Chuck E Cheese is free to get in although food is expensive. Maybe playtime there or at public library or bookstores crafts and storytimes?

    Answer by lfl at 10:24 AM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • I agree with PP look for a good pre-school and get him involved,,,my DS was crazy for Daddy at that age as well,,,it is a phase, just keep doing what your doing and it will pass. I did learn that taking things away when he whined worked well for example Mommy doesn't like it when you whine so if it continues there will be no coloring or whatever he likes today! Hang in there!!

    Answer by kimigogo at 10:29 AM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • My DD started acting out (I call it boredom) at around 2. So I put her in a preschool. Made a world of difference. She made new friends and learns all sorts of things. I noticed the acting out went away almost immediately. Maybe something to look into? Some kind of class or something where he can be away from everyone and be more independent? GL

    Answer by dawnofdestiny at 10:41 AM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • He needs discipline and structure - YOU need to provide both of those. Whether it's by planning out your day and moving him smoothly from activity to activity, or sending him to daycare or preschool or something like that, he needs more than just time at home with mommy. But really, he's acting like a normal child of that age. But if you don't nip it in the bud NOW, it'll get worse and worse.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:41 AM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • Thanks everyone, I know as soon as its warmer out things will probably get better because he loves to play outside. We did go outside today for a walk and then just play so we will see how the rest the day goes. As for preschool I have checked into and he is starting but not until fall. I do take him to the malls play area and he loves it there. I just keep telling myself it will get better and summer is almost here!

    Answer by mommyofone15 at 12:55 PM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • Big hugs. You're not a bad mom. Bad mom's wouldn't worry and seek answers on this. First, I'm not sure where you are or what the weather's been like. I can tell you though that I've yet to see a mom in my region that isn't talking about bonkers kids. LOL! It's cabin fever to the nth degree. Second, people talk about terrible 2s. For both my kids it was 3. Three was a big challenge. And finally, yes it can be jealousy. My kids are 2 years apart. My oldest needed some "me" time daily. He didn't nap by then. When my DD went down, that became DS time. It helped tremendously. Can you get him in some type of activity like a sport or parks program, library story time for preschoolers? Anything that's his and special. Good luck. This too shall pass.

    Answer by ldmrmom at 2:53 PM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • I would find a pre-school or some of ur friends and family w/ kids his age to play. And No ur not a bad mom. A bad mom is a "mom" that doesnt care and wouldnt try to help there kids.good luck to ya.

    Answer by angel_nicoel2 at 1:12 PM on Feb. 10, 2011

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