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How can I get my son to do his homework without the fight?

My son is 7 years old, in 2nd grade, and he has ADHD. When he comes home I feed him dinner and then homework. He fights with me and screams at me. He tells me he doesn't have to do it and that he isn't going to school anymore. He does go to school but that's a whole other huge fight. He doesn't start his ADHD medication until the end of March. He was just diagnosed by a therapist and psychiatrist. How can I get him to do his homework without the fight and without getting a massive headache? And without upsetting him too much.


Asked by rdbttrfly at 4:40 PM on Mar. 2, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (5)
  • My son was not diagnosed with ADHD but he was tested.Home was(and at times still is) a huge hair pulling battle.We tried many different ways to ease the stressful process(without me being on the 6 o'clock news for child abuse,lol) and without him being utterly wiped out and unfocused.The best thing that worked for us was this.I have a snack ready for him when he gets home from school and he is to sit down to do his homework right away, he can eat his snack while he gets started. No other activities can take place before he gets his homework done.(if he does ANYTHING,even watch 10 mins of tv first...forget it..hes already too distracted).I have a desk set up in his room with a small chest next to it full of any materials he may need.He is to do whatever he can by himself FIRST,then anything he needs help with, he can come ask me.After 2 years of this...he rarley has any trouble doing h.w. on his own.It works for us.

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 7:05 PM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • i would do homework first thing as soo as you get home..just to get it out of the way and so he knows he has everything elso to look forward to as soon as thats over

    Answer by shay1130 at 4:42 PM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • i agree. do it right away while you prepare dinner or something. i would just tell him that it isnt an option. tell him to do it now, get it out of the way then you can do whatever. thats how life is. responsibilities first, fun after. i have no experience with this, so im no expert. and im sure youve tried these things. good luck and hang in there.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:46 PM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • Do homework when he gets home and have a fun activity that he can do as a reward for finishing his work.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 5:05 PM on Mar. 2, 2010

  • Have you talked to the teacher? What I have my students' parent do in situations like this is set a timer for 20 minutes. The child has to sit quietly and either A) do homework or B) do nothing. At the end of the 20 minutes that's it. Then they have to bring to paper to me in the morning. If they've done 20 minutes worth of work (which is all my assignments should take) they're all set. If not they deal with consequences in class. As I teacher, I don't want parents and kid fighting over homework. If the parent will put in the effort to and have to child sit for 20 minutes most of the time the kid gets the idea that if they don't do the work they've wasted 20 minutes of playing or TV. Plus, they have to deal with me.

    Of course not all teachers agree with my resoning, but maybe your son's teacher can help.


    Answer by maxswolfsuit at 7:59 PM on Mar. 2, 2010