Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I dont see any groups for single moms with 16yr sons who are like mine.

I cry all day he swears at me hits me smokes pot all day.Failing all class's,Put his fist through the wall.Police wont take him,they said call DCYF,they say he is not bad enough to remove and there is no place to put him.Butler and bradley hospital wont keep him.He was adopted by my parents 8 yrs ago and they dont want him anymore,they gave him back,I want him I love him . He so angery at me for losing him 8 yrs ago.But DCYF is giving me another chance because I'm clean from drugs.But I can not handle him he is out of control there's no respect,he hates me!I'm afraid of him,he is going to hurt me he is 250lbs.Now when we fight I just leave and go sleep at my aunts house ,I just dont understand why I can not get him in treatment no one will help me.DCYF,EBMH

Answer Question
 
debbyl

Asked by debbyl at 11:04 PM on Mar. 2, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • I'm so sorry, that sounds so hard! It's impossible to get control back now, he knows he's bigger than you and that you can't control him or anything he does at this point. Control and respect are established when a child is very young, and it sounds like you just weren't able to provide the stablitiy that little kids need early on to develop those qualities, unfortunately. I'm very sorry that you're going through this. He will either grow out of it, or you will have to bug the authorities until they get you some help :(

    I'm so SO sorry, I hope that things work out for you soon!
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 12:04 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • Im sorry you are going through such a difficult time. I went through a difficult divorce 3 years ago from a man who was terribly abusive and my kids watched this abuse so whenever anything goes wrong in their lives they go to blaming me and taking it out on me like their Dad did. Maybe not their faults cause it's all they have seen. What I am now learning is that if I dont respect myself and stand up for myself I will not get any. Set a set of rules and stick by them and never falter and include the fact that he will treat you with respect or he will not live in your house. Be firm, always be fair and willing to talk things out, if he is willing. No yelling, no threats. Facts are facts, rules are rules. If he gets trribly out of line call the authorities and have him arrested. Worst case he'll be charged with drug use or disturbing thr peace and you'll have an advocate in place. It's called a probation officer! Good Luck!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:17 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • Oh, and since you are not his legal guardian, I don't know why the police are allowing him to stay in your house. You could legally charge your parents for the damages he's caused to your house and they would be responsible for his court fines and for the legal fines if he was convicted of assault (which if he's hitting you he would be). That would be crappy, but maybe the authorities can't help you because you're not his legal guardian making the request?
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 12:29 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • your profile says your child is 49 yrs old
    KandJmommy124

    Answer by KandJmommy124 at 10:22 PM on Mar. 3, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN