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am loosing it ..

my baby just wont bond with me no matter wat i do, i try to spend some quality time with her but she keeps rejecting me and screamin in my face every time i hold her ... whats going on ???????????????????
is this normal she hates me .. ?!?!?!?!?!

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Asked by hana87 at 3:26 AM on Mar. 3, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (10)
  • How old is she?

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 3:34 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • 3 months and a half

    Answer by hana87 at 3:36 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • Maybe your picking a time when she is tired or hungry? babies are at their best in the morning .It may not be you . maybe a perfume your wearing that's too strong, maybe she senses your stress, it maybe something else? I would probably talk the pediatrician .


    Answer by Anonymous at 3:37 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • thats wat i thought maybe it was timing .. then then i realised that in the same moment while shes screamin her father would take her n she would laugh ....

    Answer by hana87 at 3:40 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • At that age they get a little independent streak, but I would make sure that you don't have on a lotion, perfume, make-up product etc that she doesn't like the smell of, or that you have bad breath etc it is often something as simple as that. Do you breastfeed? If not you may want to look into re-lactation that is the best way to form a bond. Also do you hold her in a way she doesn't like too tight too loose etc, and finally if you get aggravated at the rejection you might actually be scaring her and that makes her scream and not want you. A calm cool comforting environment is the best for a good bond. Really think about everything you wear though that is usually the cause.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 3:40 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • at that age too she can sense YOUR emotions. if you are feeling desperate, uptight etc. she will react to that

    Answer by sati769leigh at 4:10 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • try doing massages on her feat and legs every day. She maybe a little rambling rose, lol

    Answer by mommymadness30 at 4:39 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • Babies need quantity time. Human babies are designed to spend all their time with mom. How babies are supposed to bond with their mothers is by breastfeeding, being held, sleeping in their mother's arms, being carried, and having a symbiotic relationship with their mother. If a mother chooses not to have this kind of relationship it becomes harder.

    You can't expect most babies to bond if they have not gotten a good start.


    Answer by Gailll at 9:56 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • Who is the primary caregiver? Babies also prefer "home base" -- the person who feeds, changes, and provide warmth and security (and the least stressed as others say). Do you have a sling/wrap? Breastfeed? (or bottlefeed skin to skin) Co-sleep (even if just for naps).

    I had to point out to my husband that she may prefer me as "home base" but he has the magic shoulder and she has special games just for him that she won't do with me. perhaps this is the case in reverse for you. or after her needs are met witih you maybe she wants daddy because he is taller and warmer with a deeper rumbling voice that tickles and gives her a better view of the world.


    Answer by amileegirl at 9:58 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • Hmmm how often do you hold her? I agree with Gaill. You need to spent large quantities of time with her. My son was in my arms almost 24/7 at that age.

    Are you stressed, too? That can make them cry.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:28 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

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