Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How can you get a baby over fear?

My 5 month old refuses to let any guys hold her...including her Daddy! She screams when they even try to touch her, and it's even worse if she sees me when they're holding her! Any ideas on how to help her get over this??

Answer Question

Asked by gagirl_1984 at 8:43 AM on Mar. 3, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • All babies go through anxiety phases. Just be patient she will outgrow it. Don't push it or you can make it far worse! I find that a baby that has just napped, just eaten, and is ready to play and feels secure is more likely to tolerate people they might n normally be wary about.

    Answer by amileegirl at 9:27 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • I sure hope so. This 'phase' has lasted about 4 months now... and although I love her so much, it gets stressful having to do everything by myself, since she won't let her Daddy help me! Not to mention, it breaks his heart everytime he tries to hold her and she cries... and I can't do anything about it!

    Answer by gagirl_1984 at 10:24 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • Make sure Daddy is around more while you're holding her. When she's with the two of you, hold her between you so she gets more comfortable. If you're breastfeeding, pump enough for a bottle and let Daddy feed her some.
    My 15 month old was definitely a "momma's boy" until he was around 9-10 months and old enough to really play. Now he's gravitating more and more towards his dad even when I'm around. Usually babies "prefer" the parent that is spending more time with them, generally the mom. As she gets older she will get more accustomed to him, and other men.

    Answer by missanc at 10:31 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • My husband felt the same way. I encouraged him to change her diaper :) If she's going to cry anyway even if I do it, might as well. LOL
    Also, keep in mind that babies are happiest in the morning and are more receptive. We co sleep so I took advantage of happy morning baby. Upon awaking I put her between us so she could soak up the daddy warmth and they could interact. I also had to point out to him that she cries with me too sometimes if I can't figure out what she needs. And she will do things with him that she won't do with me...he has the magic shoulder, for example. Also, when she was tiny, if she was swaddled she liked to be with him.

    Answer by amileegirl at 10:56 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

  • I gave him burrito baby often, even if she was asleep in my arms I'd hand her off.

    These days, If she really wants to look around from a high vantage point she really enjoys him when she's in that mood.
    Also babies are more recpetive after they've had a good nap, are dry, and just ate! That is the perfect time to do a handoff, especially if they are ready to play or are just feeling a bit drowsy. Sometimes even going out side where there are lots of things to look at will quiet a fussy baby!

    My husband now knows that it isn't personal (though it does make his heart pout). Instead of getting frustrated he works on finding something special that they can do...even if that means bringing the baby to the bathroom while I take a shower and hold her above the curtain so she can peek at me. Sheesh!

    Answer by amileegirl at 10:59 AM on Mar. 3, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.