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leaving your child on the first day of preschool and letting them cry? or stay until they are comfortable?

i thought it would be better just taking my son to preschool and leave right away, let him cry it out, and he'll be fine. but i was talking to my mom about it last night and she said if i leave him and let him cry he'll be scarred for life. now i'm kind of iffy about the situation. what did you guys, or what are you going to do? and what do you think is a better idea?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:09 PM on Mar. 4, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (11)
  • He will not be scarred for life. LOL I have seen MANY kids that did this. It is worse if you hang around then leave. My son only cried for a sec. the teachers assured me he was fine not 5 minutes after I left. Don't worry.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 5:13 PM on Mar. 4, 2010

  • The teacher usually says to just go. From everything I have heard they are typically fine after a few minutes and start having fun. I'm sure it's very difficult, I haven't had to do this yet and I'm dreading it but that is what I've heard to do.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:20 PM on Mar. 4, 2010

  • don't worry they see other kids playing an doing stuff an they want to join in right away..the crying only last for 5 minutes or less. an children cry cause they see us every day all day long an they aren't used to be alone without us, but once they start playing they forget all about us till they see us when we come an pick them

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:20 PM on Mar. 4, 2010

  • I just had to deal with this recently. I actually went with my son for the first two days and then went for a few hours. Just last week he started going by himself. His teacher said he cried for like 5 minutes and after that was fine. I felt better going with him the first couple of times, I think more than anything it made me feel better. Now he's doing great.

    Answer by CBMama06 at 5:34 PM on Mar. 4, 2010

  • On the other hand...he may not cry one bit. Mine couldn't get rid of us fast enough. There was a sand table to be played with!

    Answer by gdiamante at 5:39 PM on Mar. 4, 2010

  • when i took dd to preschool the first time she didnt cry at all. she was so excited, she didnt even say bye

    Answer by piwife at 5:52 PM on Mar. 4, 2010

  • On the FIRST day I stayed with my DD for a bit and let her explore her surroundings. After that she did cry at drop off, and I just left. She still will once in a while, and I kiss her good by and leave. She is not scarred. That is what I have to do, or I make it worse by staying. No mater what I am going to work, and she is staying at daycare. I won;t tease her by staying just because she cries. She always stops crying 2 minutes after I leave.


    Answer by KairisMama at 6:04 PM on Mar. 4, 2010

  • Scarred? I dont think so. My son was VERY attached to me and I to him. The first day of school he screamed so loud you could hear him outside the school. Against my better judgement i went back in and stayed awhile. Each time I turned to leave he would just start screaming again. I had to be the parent and just leave. A week into the school year and he didnt cry anymore.. as a matter of fact i could keep him next to me long enough to get a hug or a kiss lol... he'd take off.


    Answer by 4xsthetrouble at 8:00 PM on Mar. 4, 2010

  • Nope, sorry grandma. The teachers are good at dealing with those things, and it's a good thing for them to begin trying their hands at comforting him. He will form an attachment to them, too. I felt so awful when my daughter cried... I ached for her all day until I picked her up again. The first few days they told me she really had had tough days. Then there was a brief period where she talked fondly of school but would tense up and freak out right as we got out of the car to go in... then there was the promise of a dum-dum if she could be brave and say "goodbye mom!" with a kiss and a hug... I always reminded her "mommy always comes back." After that, I would hear her playing with her stuffed animals, saying, "I will ALWAYS come back, have fun at school." For a short while she would cry just out of habit, but after awhile she didn't even notice my request for a hug and kiss. Don't stay. It makes it harder for everyone!

    Answer by EmilySusan at 8:14 PM on Mar. 4, 2010

  • god ive gotta do this in a few months, my baby is starting school and i will probably cry more than him...

    Answer by stacy1403 at 9:58 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

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