Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What do you think is the hardest part of being a step parent?

For it's the stupid people who think as step parents as "fake parents" who don't love their kids I love my step sons more than anything, but thats just me. What do you think?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:15 AM on Mar. 5, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (19)
  • I am going to be married soon and I love my soon to be step kids.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:26 AM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • For me the hardest part is loving him so much. I wish more then anything that i could've been the one who gave birth to him. I love him so much! Being a mom, without having become a mom.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:29 AM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • I think the hardest thing is to feel accepted.

    Answer by LogansMama09 at 1:35 AM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • accepted as another parent i mean

    Answer by LogansMama09 at 1:35 AM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • I too love my step boys, they are 4 & 5, I moved in with DH when the boys were 7 mos and 20 mos. I couldn't love these 2 more then if I'd given birth to them. But in my case, I'm the one that feels like I'm the fake parent, the "cheap substitute mom", I didn't grow up with step parents, didn't even have any friends that had step parents. When they were gone to their mom's last summer for their 5 wk visit, I didn't even feel I had the right to talk to them on the phone. I want so much for us to be a family, but feel I can't "be" a family with DH because we don't have any kids together (mine have moved out) and we'll never be able to have any together. His view is that the only 'steps' in our house are the ones outside the front door. It hurts so bad sometimes that I've woke up crying in the night thinking that if something happens to DH that I'll never see the boys again. Sorry, it's been a bad week.

    Answer by daisy521 at 1:37 AM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • Wishing I could make his life easier and not being able to. His mother is his mother, whether she loves him or not.

    Answer by bellaamore at 2:03 AM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • Whattheheck if he has a mom then he shouldn't be calling you mom at all, let alone you being angry that he is calling you by your name. That is how it should be.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:28 AM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • For me, it seems like everything:
    BM is a psycho, and was also abusive to my SD (and my DH when they were married). She rarely sees SD, but thinks she is the best mom ever.
    My DH has not gotten the legal custody changed over because he keeps "forgetting" to call a lawyer to get it done... and since nothing has ever been filed, we cannot get back child support (it would be about $8500 now). Oh yea, did I mention we've had her since August of 2008??
    My DH dumped all the parenting on me, even though I didn't know how (our DD was 4 months old when SD came to live with us). He told me that since i'm a SAHM, I should do all the parenting of both kids... Then when he didn't like my parenting, would criticize me & call me a wicked stepmother. But would never tell me anything to help me out!!
    My SD has emotional & social problems because of BM, and guess who gets to deal with those? ME.
    (cont. below)

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:31 AM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • Agree with you!

    Answer by Lucykate78 at 4:32 AM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • (cont. from above)
    My DH hardly does anything for her- She has lived with us for over 1 1/2 years, and has yet to go to the doctor or dentist for a checkup. She went to the eye doctor last week after DD broke her glasses, but not until she had gone to school for a week without glasses- she can only see about 18 inches in front of her without lenses.
    She is not in counseling anymore (she was but we had problems with our insurance & couldn't afford to private pay). My DH is supposed to find her a low-cost counselor, but "they haven't called back yet"- for 3 weeks now! (Funny, when I call, they call back within 2 hours...). I can't take her to any medical appointments because I'm "just the stepmom", so I can't do anything about it.
    (cont. below)

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:38 AM on Mar. 5, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.