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Do you think he could be addicted?

My husband of 11 years goes to the internet more then to me in the bedroom. We have discussed and fought over this time and time again (little over a year), but I maybe lucky to see him in the bedroom once or twice a month. I know he is not messing around in RL with anyone. and it is porn sites he visits, not one on one with others. He does this 3-4 times a week. Am I in the right for being upset? I'm in my sexual prim, and not seeing ANY satisfaction in the bedroom dept. Do you think he could possibly be addicted to porn? I would disconnect internet on our computers, but he also has internet on his phone.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:08 PM on Mar. 5, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • so disconnect that to? Hes grown if he likes porn whatever
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:10 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • I would tell him....if you like porn and your HAND so much....marry THEM...because i wont be having sex with you untill you show some flippin interest in me thats not fair to you hunny...my hubby could watch porn all day everyday if he had the time to....but he'd still come to me for sex. sometimes we have sex while watching porn. if him watching porn ever interfered with our sex life...idk what i would do at that point, but it should not interfere with your sex life...at least it doesn't in my situation, and my hubby does this a few times a week as well.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:11 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • I wouldn't mind it so much, but...... What about my needs too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:12 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • look at it with him and make it part of your bedroom life
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 2:12 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • That sounds like an addiction because it is causing problems in his normal, everyday life.

    Personally, if that became a problem for me, I'd talk to him CALMLY about it. Do NOT get upset. He will get defensive and deny things immediately if you start yelling or crying. Just tell him, "I've noticed that we are not having sex very often, but you are looking at porn on the computer even though I'm more than willing to have sex with you. What can we do to make it so we're both happy sexually, because I'm feeling very unfulfilled right now."

    And then if it didn't stop, I'd put a block on all porn sites so he wouldn't have the option.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:17 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • I had this problem also but dh never came to me. I just about flipped out and ready to leave.I told him this was hurting me soooo much and also killing our marriage. I am not opposed to porn and we watched together in our earlier years but I am older and can not be compared to the young sexy flesh online. To me it is like having an affair. We went to counseling and things are getting better and he is no longer turning to porn for his excitement because he does not want to lose me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:17 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • well in your case where he is doing it so often i would be concerned. also a lot of people say that infidelity starts in the mind. it is true if he is fantasising about being with all these woman and paying less attention to you . tell him that you want him to pay attention to you and to your body and that you dont like being compared to all theses women. I think fantacies are ok as long as they dont intrude on your life and it seems that it is. when he doesn't want it anymore in the bedroom then yes it is a problem. a very serious one.
    TaiM

    Answer by TaiM at 2:48 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • anan 2:17 has the right idea. great way to bring it up..
    TaiM

    Answer by TaiM at 2:49 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

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