Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

My SS gives up on things if they are too difficult and now won't try or do anything besides video games.

My SS gets very frustrated with things quick and gives up if it doesn't come naturally to him. We bought him a bike and he jumped on it with the training wheels on. We took them off and now he won't touch it because it was hard. We have also bought him skates, a skateboard, and a scooter. All of which he begged for and then only tried for 2 seconds until he realized it was hard. It's getting so bad that he won't play on playgrounds on equipment he's never played on before. He won't try out for sports or karate, or just do anything that he hasn't already done. We've tried being nice about it and explaining that it's difficult for everyone in the beginning. i've taken things away by saying.. if you don't try this for at least 10 minutes then no video games all down to my husband really going off beause he just won't attempt to do new things. What do you do/ It's affecting his school life as well.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:18 PM on Mar. 5, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (8)
  • my son is like that, he has aspbergers. don't push, he will get there.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:54 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • Sometimes a book can encourage a child to try something new or encourage them because it is written on their comprehension level.  See some books that encourage/self-confidence/you can do it type books http://astore.amazon.com/wwwcjkidzcom3-20?%5Fencoding=UTF8&node=17

    momjs

    Answer by momjs at 10:39 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • My SS can be like this too. Same for the bike. He doesn't like to do it because it's hard. He wanted to quit a sport he wanted to try when he found out he wasn't as good as some of the other kids and that there were techniques and rules to it and decided that was it, and we made him stick it out the few extra classes. If he's playing a game with me and wants to quit because he's losing, I don't let him. I just tell him, most things take a lot of practice to be good at, but if he quits before he's tried he'll never be good at it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:29 PM on Mar. 5, 2010

  • i would drop trying to get him to do anything for a few months completely. but of course you should restrict the video games to an hour a day and tell him its bad for his eyes if he uses them more. (actually u shud have a restriction for total of screen time which includes tv comp and video games). have books and toys he can play at home. again in the toys for a few months dont give him something that he might give up on.
    after he's had a chance to forget about how he doesnt want to do new stuff.. try doing a new activity 'with him'. so go skating together, cycling together or something. and fall a few times yourself if you have to so he sees u learning too.
    hope that helps
    happymum2010

    Answer by happymum2010 at 2:02 AM on Mar. 6, 2010

  • I have a son like that BUT I do not let him give up it seems realy mean but i will make him keep trying even if he is crying. I will tell you that he is always proud of himself after he has accomplished what he had tried(or was made to finish).
    IMAMOM2-2KIDS

    Answer by IMAMOM2-2KIDS at 2:24 AM on Mar. 6, 2010

  • TAKE AWAY THE VIDEOGAMES!!! Then he will have no other thing to do but try. Encourage even the smallest accomplishments, push him but not really hard. Don't push until he cries, that is just mean and can backfire. He has to see the accomplishments he is achieving with being bullied into doing it. He has to realize his own abilities. Show him that you can accomplish things that are new to you or that you thought you couldn't accomplish.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:43 AM on Mar. 6, 2010

  • I agree with take away or severely restrict the video games. Possibly make the ability to play video games a reward for trying something new, but not for just 10 minutes of effort.
    I have a hard time getting my soon to be 6 year old to try new things, but I keep making her try and she comes around after a while. Once she has tried something and liked it, I praise her so much. I say, I knew you would like it, I am so glad you liked it, I thought this would be something you would enjoy etc etc I try to make it exciting for her for the next time she tries something new.
    WillDoDa

    Answer by WillDoDa at 4:17 PM on Mar. 6, 2010

  • Bye bye video games....and if it's warm enough outside, make him go play outside!
    MamaRoberts

    Answer by MamaRoberts at 10:44 PM on Mar. 6, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN