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SKs don't want to go back home...

Okay, so I don't have a problem with this. My SKs have had a rough life with their mother-in and out of out-patient rehabs for alcohol addiction, bipolar disorder, possible narcotic sleep med addiction. The problem is, their mother HATES me. She talks smack about me all the time in front of my SKs. They're 7, 5, and 3 years old, so they recognize that what she says about me is totally false.(I'm "a sloppy b*** and never clean up", "don't respect them", I "hate them", the list goes on and on. ) She is basically mad, because my DH married ME and not her. (He cheated on me whenever we had issues. I've been with him 16 years, and he met her during one of our breakups and kept bouncing between the two of us-but we've been to Christ-based counseling and things are SO much better! We got married 3 years ago.) Anyway...(cont.)

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:22 PM on Mar. 7, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • Have DH file for sole. To hell with what she wants - she is not taking care of the kids, not fostering a good relationship dynamic, and if you can prove the living conditions - keep in mind, hot pockets and koolaid are not neglect, no matter how you may scoff at them - DH has a chance.

    A judge is going to look askance at the entire sitch, IMPO. It's extremely tacky. I hope that you and DH continue in counseling, because oopsing 3x with the other woman is 3 x too many. As long as you are not a felon, or an abuser, what she thinks of you is irrelevant. Actually, DH could argue that she always knew you could be the SM, as he was with you when she decided to sleep with a married man.

    Get to an atty, and file for sole. Don't worry about BM, because what she thinks of you, her hatred, is only going to look poorly on her. As long as you have nothing on a record, she can;t say much about you.
    LiliM

    Answer by LiliM at 5:49 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • (cont.) She has tried luring my dh back to her so many times, and if she wasn't scared of going to jail because of the court ordered visitation, he'd NEVER see them. My 7 y/o dsd told me she is scared of her mommy because she's always yelling at them. She has an abusive(verbally, that is) boyfriend. Her mommy doesn't feed them anything but Hot pockets and Koolaid, maybe cereal on days their late to school. Mostly, they eat at school or daycare. I do the girls' hair EVERY weekend so their mother doesn't have to mess with it. He's been asking for full custody, where he would allow her visitation, NO PROBLEM-but because she hates me so much, she isn't going for it. What do we do? Do WE file for full custody? I would love for them to be with us permanently. They're really good kids.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:31 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • Perhaps you should include her in the counseling your already in. I can see how she would be bitter if she had 3 kids with this man over 7 years and he chose you. The perfect outcome would be for you all to see eye to eye for the children. If you and DH truely believe the kids would be healthier with you than start documenting things and prepare for a legal battle. Try for full and maybe you can get joint. I see no reason why you don't already have joint, with the kids staying longer than the weekend...or if thats already considered joint maybe you can fight to have it reversed, with her seeing them on the weekends and you having them weekdays. GL
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:38 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • I would go for full custody. those kids should be treated better and it seems like you have enough evidence that her home isnt a right environment for them.
    SabrenaLeigh

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 2:16 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • What are SK's???
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:25 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • SK=stepkid SKs=stepkids
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:31 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • Why has dad not filed for full custody knowing all of this is going on?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:00 PM on Mar. 7, 2010