Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Why the SAHM Working mom battle? I don't get it!!

How is one better than the other? I never knew there was a problem with either one until I came to cafe mom. I guess I just always thought we all did what we had to do to make our family work. I have done both and I am not biased. I know both sides. I couldn't imagine criticzing someone for doing what they have to do to get by. And we ALL love our kids no matter how we live!

Answer Question

Asked by Steff107 at 8:07 PM on Mar. 7, 2010 in Just for Fun

Level 3 (16 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • I dont understand either. I do not care if what other moms do in that regard. I do what I doesnt affect anyone but my family. So why does it matter to someone if I work or stay home?

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:09 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • it will always be a battle..I have also done both. been a SAHM...been a working mom and now I am a mom in school FT so kinda had all worlds. But for me FT school with the kids has been the hardest and most stressful! I do 40 hr clinicals and its just alot with 3 kids. They all have pros and cons and I think everyone situation is different. Some of us SAHM have no help while others get lost of help with breaks.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:10 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • nope they are just different choices moms make. neither is better than the other

    Answer by sati769leigh at 8:10 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • I guess that's the problem Steff... these women that are slinging it back and forth HAVE NOT done both. Maybe they need to so they could really experience it. I AGREE!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:10 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • I agree with you. I have been on both sides of the spectrum also, with now being a sahm....I never knew it was such an issue until I saw it on cafemom. We all are mothers, no matter what we do. You gotta do what is necessary to provide for your children, and if you can be a sahm, then that is great, but if you have to work, or choose to work...that is great too.

    Answer by fallnangel93 at 8:10 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • I"ve done both. Even if I had not, I still dont see what it matters. Not my concern what others do.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:12 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • lol anon 810 it's like that no matter what you do. Some working moms get daycare a lot easier than others because they have family, and some sahm don't get a break because they don't have an out, and some working moms don't get a break because they go straight from work to a different kind of work, and both run errands and pay bills etc.

    Answer by Steff107 at 8:12 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • I've done both too and I don't get it either.


    Answer by beeky at 8:13 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • I don't find it to be a battle IRL... just online. IRL I have friends who are SAHMs, WOHMs, WAHMs, students, part-time, full-time, etc, and there doesn't seem to be any battle over who works how much where. I do have some things in common with SAHMs that I don't with others, but that doesn't mean I can't listen to and empathize with their challenges and celebrate their accomplishments and understand where they're coming from in life. And even if they aren't SAHMs, I can expect the same from them. One of my good friends is a FT working mama of an only child -- her life looks pretty different than mine. But when we get together, we can laugh and joke and talk and share with mutual respect and affection.

    I only have judgment and intolerance for people who think they can decide what's best for every family, one-size-fits-all.

    Answer by Collinsky at 8:20 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • I've only ever known it to be a battle on cafemom. Everyone else I know (in real life) are very supportive of the choices we all make as mothers and know we are all doing what is best for our children. Unfortunatly, there are a lot of closed minded people who think that their way is the only way that things should be done, and that is just not so. Everyone's life situation is different so what works for one family might now work for the next.

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 8:28 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.