Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Was I wrong to go out for a few drinks with my co-workers?

Last night I went out for a few drinks with my co-workers and wore a v-neck top. My husband is so mad at me that he won't look or talk to me, except to call me a slut and curse at me and tell me he wants a divorce. Now I'm not completely innocent, I did hide my top under a sweater when I left b/c he doesn't approve of anything that shows ANY skin. And I didn't plan on drinking. But still don't think he should be this mad at me! Am I wrong?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:21 PM on Mar. 7, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (35)
  • you had to know before you went out how your husband feels, he is very very insecure. not healthy. a marriage without trust is not a healthy marriage. But again, you had to have known he would not be happy. why would you choose to go and disrespect him?
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 8:24 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • Oh no, he knew I was going. I was going b/c my boss was performing. So a big group from work was going. I just had no intention of actually drinking. But when I got there, I changed my mind. I understand him being mad, but not mad enough to get a divorce over it!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:28 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • If you had to hide what you were wearing, yes, you were wrong. You violated his trust. I don't blame him for being angry. You should have been entirely honest with him.
    christaberk

    Answer by christaberk at 8:28 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • It sounds like he overreacted but then again, you did say that your husband does not approve of any clothing that shows extra skin. If you hid your shirt under a sweater you should have hid it again before you returned home. You are not a child for him to approve or not of the way that you opt to dress. If he is a good man to you and he makes you happy, then try to work things out, but if he is always verbally abusive and agressive, and you are not happy, then maybe divorce is best. Life is too short.
    alejandra559

    Answer by alejandra559 at 8:31 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • I can understand where you're coming from because talking about divorce IS a little harsh....but he does have every right to be upset...granted name calling is really immature and isnt healthy but neither is sneaking a v-neck shirt that you know he wouldnt've liked. My husband would be furious if I went out in something that he doesn't like and even more so if he found out I was drinking when I say I wouldn't.
    LynnB1

    Answer by LynnB1 at 8:39 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • How often has she lied to him like this? Seems like he is prety justified in not trusting her and being angry. I highly doubt this was the FIRST time she snuck around like this and lied. I suspect he would not be threatening divorce over ONE incident
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 8:43 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • First of all.. if you knew he didn't like you wearing things like that, then you were wrong for wearing it,, wrong for hiding it and why wasn't your hubby with you at this place?
    I might be a bit old fashioned but if it was a group from work going... why not invite the spouses or SO's?

    Divorce is harsh but I'm sure he feels like you betrayed him and he's wondering if you lied about that, what else are you lying about.
    My guess is you wore that shirt to impress some guy coworker... you should've stayed sober so you could atleast change out of it before you got home.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 8:53 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • *shivers* are you serious?.. he called you a slut for wearing a v-neck? Wow...no woman deserves to be called that by the man she loves! You are a grown~ ass woman who deserves to be able to go out for a drink if you feel like it and wear whatever the hell you want! It's not like you wore a g-string and pasties fer crap sakes...his behavior was totally uncalled for..you deserve way better hun, grant him the divorce!
    chocolatluver

    Answer by chocolatluver at 8:57 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • I am shocked so many of you are agreeing with her abusive husband on this issue! Did you all miss the part where he called her a SLUT?...for wearing a V-NECK? And cursed at her???
    chocolatluver

    Answer by chocolatluver at 9:00 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

  • hes a controlling douchebag. end of story.
    LA09TKP

    Answer by LA09TKP at 9:02 PM on Mar. 7, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Relationships
how can i spice it up?

Next question overall (Pregnancy)
nausea..HELP

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN