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How do you stop a 14 year old from having a tamtrum and screaming at her siblings?

Ok, homework-she loses tv privlidge.
house chores-she loses her contacts
she has been grounded for a while like not going out because she failed the marking period until the grades are up she won't be going out. Now what???

How do I punish her for that tantrum???? Help. Is there a list ??? My teen is driving me insane..

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:09 PM on Mar. 9, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (19)
  • You take away her contacts? like the alternative for glasses kind of contacts?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:17 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • A tantrum? At 14? You take away her wardrobe and YOU pick out her clothes for her every day. 14 and throwing a tantrum. I wish my child would!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:20 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • beat her ass.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:22 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • why are you punishing her for a tantrum? what is she doing? is she breaking things? is she yelling about it?
    if she's yelling and letting it out, I personally think the same is true for a 14 year old as a 4 year old.
    let her let her feelings out and don't give it attention.
    when she's feeling better, then ask her if she wants to talk about it- you can tell her that you don't approve of the way she handled it and discuss a better to let it out.

    she's still going to get upset and feel how she feels-I personally think that punishing someone for being upset is counter effective.
    it's like telling them- you aren't allowed to have your own feelings- you need to feel the way I want you to-

    maybe she just needs advice on better ways to deal with her anger- people of all age can need help with that sometimes.
    sorry if I've offended- it's not meant to be mean- just a suggestion.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:35 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • is anon 12:22 according to the rules?
    hope no one promotes beating a kid-
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:48 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • i was the same way when i was 14 and i got sent to some hospital for anger management and depression. i made my mom and my brothers life a living hell. you could take her to a dr. or something like that, i never calmed down until i had my daughter, that kind of stuff runs in my family, mental problems do.
    kd2kds

    Answer by kd2kds at 12:51 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • 14 may not have much to do with it.
    I'm 39 and have been known to throw a tantrum or two every now and then- now we just call it hormones!

    I know a guy who is a teacher of elementary school kids and he can throw a tantrum just as good as any little kid- except he pouts like there's no tomorrow-

    my sister is approaching 37 and still throws a fit when she looses a game- and I do mean throw- she'll throw the cards, the game board, you name it!

    but I do think that anger management is important- then we all do the best we can
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:08 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • You need to examine how it has come to be her belief that a tantrum is acceptable & might achieve something. Perhaps you could try treating her like an adult. Sit her down & talk to her about all of the issues you are having. Ask her what she thinks are the issues leading to these problems. Be fair & accept her complaints, but if she tries to put all of the blame on you, her siblings or anyone else, continue to direct her towards examining her own role in the issues. Perhaps offer her a clean slate to start with, all punishments are immediately suspended & ask her to discuss with you what she believes the consequences should be for future tantrums, failing grades, unfinished chores, etc. When you have come to an agreement that you both feel is fair, ask her to write it out as a contract that you will both sign & will both refer back to in the case of any breech. Then stick to it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:22 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • Also in the contract I would define "tantrums" so that she is given the right to be in a bad mood, even snippy, but does not have the right to lash out excessively at anyone
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:24 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • Have a tantrum like a 2 yr old....treat them like the 2 yr old they are immulating.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 2:08 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

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