Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

AM I OVEREACTING 17 year old daughter is wearing stretchers in her ears?

My daughter is 17 a good kid. She asked if she could wear stretchers in her ears I said NO. Then we compromised to allowing her to wear the tiniest ones. My daughter PROMISED she would not go any larger. Well, I noticed she has gone larger and you could put a pencil through the hole in her ear. Did I overact when I told her to take them out??? She refuses to


Asked by Anonymous at 3:44 PM on Mar. 9, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

This question is closed.
Answers (101)
  • Well until she's 18, so for another whole year, you can boss her around, past that she can do as she pleases, move out and yes she may hold that one thing over your head.

    IMO it's a pick your own battle kind of thing. With my husband he's held some resentment because he wasn't allowed to have long hair as a teenager, so now as an adult he keeps his hair long. His parents hate it but nothing they can do, now he does and always has taken very good care of his hair and keeps it professionally pulled back, but that isn't good enough for his parents. IMO they didn't pick a good enough battle and it’s become something more than just about hair, it’s become an issue of respecting and his decisions. I guess the question I would ask myself is when she turns 18 are you going to react as you do now at the age of 17 and is this something you think she'll outgrow wanting in only one year.

    Answer by Knightquester at 4:33 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • IDK.. is it a battle you want to pick?

    Answer by peanutsmommy1 at 3:44 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • I would be pissed too. Really does she think it will be easy to get a job with big holes in her ears. Kids are all about the here and now not the five or ten years from now. This is one thing I would never budge on. GL with that and I hope my girls never want them.

    Answer by Fordmomma at 3:50 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • they are her ears let her do what she wants. there is worse things she could be doing. although i just have to add i think stretched ears are so frickin you said yourself, shes a good if thats the worst thing shes done, id leave it alone!!

    Answer by alexis_06 at 3:50 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • I'd rip them out of her ears just because she lied and went behind my back.

    Answer by SaraP1989 at 3:50 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • you are boss till she is 18,its great that shes good,but you still set the rules.

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 3:50 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • You shouldn't have agreed to the little ones, it's done so move on, she will outgrow it and have a streched out earlobe, her earlobe! Not a battle to pick. It is already done

    Answer by older at 3:53 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • it can be addicting getting them bigger and bigger! just like tattoos. you get one, you like the rush of having one, then you want more. it will take a while, but the holes will shrink a little bit and she'll be able to wear the smaller ones comfortably.

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 3:54 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • I can't really talk, when mine was 16 she already had a spiral in one ear, an industrial in the other (that's a bar that goes across the top, two normally placed holes in one ear, and three in the other, one she did herself, all of them gauges. Not to mention her belly button pierced and two surface piercings by her belly button, sort of looked like a peace sign. It was something she'd always wanted to do, and like she said, in a few years she'd probably have to take them all out for a job, so why couldn't she enjoy them now? She made a good point I coudln't argue with, she's almost 21 now and as she said, most of the holes have closed now cuz she couldn't wear them for work. Of course now she's getting tattoos, which I don't have a problem with I've got 4 of my far.

    Answer by daisy521 at 3:54 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • I agree with older.  It's done, so move on.  She is almost an adult anyway, so why turn it into a major battle that will only cause a rift in your relationship?  IMO it's just not worth it.


    Answer by beeky at 3:56 PM on Mar. 9, 2010