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does anyone know what happens when one parent files a custody modification and the other files a visitation modification?

my sons father filed a petition for custody and i filed a petition for him to have less visitation since he doesnt make his court ordered visits.

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:22 PM on Mar. 9, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (6)
  • if you have documentation that you have not prevented him from seeing the child, and that he has not visited at all, you may be able to convince the courts.

    Unless he has good evidence that you are not caring for the child (partying, lots of men in and out, alcohol/drugs, etc.) then he has very little chance of actually succeeding in a custody modification.

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 6:24 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • adding that I mean actual documentation, NOT walking into court and SAYING that he has not visited.

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 6:25 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • Thank you for your help. I have a notebook with the dates (and most of the reasons) hes canceled. I planned on bringing it in with me when i go. Im just really confused on what they do with both, and i filed mine because they said that if i didn't they wouldnt even address my issues.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:29 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • A little side note. Type up what is in your notebook so it is easy to read, then take BOTH copies to the bank and have it notarized, or have your attorney (if you have one) notarize it for you. It will be easier for the judge to read through (which is MUCH appreciated), and still maintain the original copy.

    I went through this recently with my Ex husband, and am about to go through it again. OH JOY!

    Luck to you. Most courts will not see fit to alter custody unless the mother has done something horrible, so don't worry about that.

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 6:39 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • OH man im sorry i couldn't imagine having to go through this a second time. I really hope it works out for you

    ive been so stressed out with it because i know if he even had unsupervised visits that my son would get hurt. hes just a really careless selfish person, and unfortunately im pretty sure hes doing this because of his girlfriend since he said shes the reason he even comes to visit. (she can't have kids and wants them, which i feel horrible about, but ive been playing both the role of mom and dad since my son was born so im not ok with them playing house with my son to put it lightly) and i hate i have to post anonymously but somehow theyve seemed to find anything on other sites that ive posted.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:48 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • Yeah, I know what you mean about getting hurt. Their father abducted my oldest son when we separated, withheld him for 4 months, only to have him removed by the police while my ex was doing heroin!
    He has ZERO ground to stand on, so I am not worried. He has never gone to rehab, refuses to pay support, and is currently homeless. What a winner!

    You wanna talk about it, send me a message. I understand laying low. I had to live in a battered womens shelter for 6 months pending our divorce hearing because he was trying to kill me, he found me twice, and I had to be moved... crazy times. Crazier man. He still gets supervised visitation, but guess who was appointed to supervise? ME!!! even though I have a protective order... EFFING INSANE!

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 6:54 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

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