Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

i dont know what to do, im so lost, and so saddened by it.

heres the deal. I think my SO is hiding something from me...what i have no idea. We used to argue incessantly over the fact that he smokes pot so he said he would stop...to be honest, i dont believe him. Anyhow i have a bad feeling in my gut that hes doing something behind my back. He is currently at a work (as a bartender) and our car is with him. We only have one set of keys which are obviously with him. I know i can get a ride out there but i need an excuse of what i "cant find" as a reason to search the car and see if anything is there...i know it sounds sad but im at the end of my rope and need to know. I cant look tomorrow because im at school until like literally 10 min before he leaves for work....any ideas what I can use for an excuse? i know i sound pathetic but have you ever felt like this to where you just need to know no matter what it takes?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:49 PM on Mar. 9, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • no i have never felt like this..what makes you think hes hiding something? if you have no trust you have no relationship.what makes you think you will find something in the car?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:51 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • tel him you cant find you drivers license or I.D. and you think it might be in the car.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:51 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • First, the next time you get the car alone, go get a set of keys made for your self. If he is doing some thing behind your back. You will find out about it eventually. Most of the time you do not have to go hunting for it. Ask your self this. "When I do find this thing he is hiding from me. What am I going to do about it"?

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 6:55 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • OP here: its mainly i think hes getting high after work. Some of you will tell me pot is no big deal but to me it is...so if thats what hes doing the pot will be in the car. if i can see it and know with "evidence" that hes lying to me then i have to leave because ill never trust him again.....hes been going through eyedrops like nothing and just stupid tlittle things that make me think he's as my friend put it "cheating on me with weed"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:57 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • OP: I know the truth always surfaces but i dont know i can wait however long that takes.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:58 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • I lost my brother due to drugs, and I don't care what it is, I don't agree w/ it. If you are already sure enough that he is doing it behind your back then he most likely is. Have you ever heard of the saying, if you feel it in your gut, then its probably true! good luck to you!
    Tiffany237

    Answer by Tiffany237 at 7:03 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • I went through the same thing with my x, I told him when we met I would not be with anyone who did drugs, no problem he said, he smoked "a little pot once in awhile" and giving it up for me was a non issue...well, I would find pot everywhere, we moved several times throughout the first 3 years of our relationship and of course the pot always belonged to the previous tennant..bruther...and I would go outside when he was smoking cigarettes and swear I smelled pot, but he would tell me I was crazy, his marlboros just smelled like that. (yeah I was born yesterday asshole, I always knew)..one day I saw him rolling up a piece of pot and putting it in the tip of his cigarette when he thought I wasn't looking (peeked through the window) he was busted, he had never stopped smoking pot just started lying about it...I never ever trusted him throughout the entire relationship and I am so glad to not have to feel that way anymore!.(HUGS)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:06 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • OP here: Previous poster..........is your ex my current fiance? lol its seriously the exact same situation almost...similar situations....i just need ot know for the closure ya know! except for him it was always his dads...or friends...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:13 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • go and tell him you left a book or a improtant set of notes in the car.
    lovemybabys1106

    Answer by lovemybabys1106 at 8:04 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • Just leave him girl you will find someone better and maybe the next guy wont even be the type that smokes lol. quti wasting your life on someone who lie's life is short so be happy
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:22 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN