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How do I keep my son from looking up to his father working in a strip club and dating strippers?

My sons father manages a strip club on bourbon st in new orleans. How do I keep my son from looking at his father and thinking his job is awesome? Hormones will play into that a lot. How do I guide him away from the sex and drugs that come with his fathers lifestyle? I don't want to bash his father, but I need a way to explain that that is not the road he needs to go down. Its not an acceptable way to live in the real world. Looking up to his fathers job could change the way he treats or thinks about women. Its not a place he needs to be in. College, and nice respectful, classy women is what he needs in his life. How do I explain that when the strip club life seems to be working for his dad?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:33 PM on Mar. 9, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (48)
  • How is your son?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:38 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • Wow, and you picked him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:38 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • Sorry left out a word

    How old is your son?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:39 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • Remember you picked him not your son. If he wants to look up to dad there isn't much you can do about it but set a good example. Make sure you pick a new man with better values. Know someone better before you have sex and have a child with them. It can be contradicting and confusing for a child. He is being told what dad does is wrong, but you mom as a woman had sex with him and had a child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:45 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • Yes, I picked him, but young people sometimes do stupid things.....thus this post. that's not really helpful. This is a serious problem, and I can't change who his father is and that mistake. I am trying to prevent another similar mistake from happening, so if you don't have anything constuctive to post, and only want to point out the stupitity of my youth.....thanks but im well aware of that. Hindsight and all that. Moving on....

    He's about to be 16.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:48 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • seriously? you can't- you can express your opinions, but that's about it. He'll make his own decisions, just because his opinions aren't the same as yours doesn't make it wrong-
    hope it works out for you-
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:50 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • don't post your bull shit drama about how you had sex with a guy who doesn't respect women and whine when whe don't cottle you. You aren't moving on you are on the internet complaining about it. There's nothing you can do but LIKE I SAID set a good example. Sorry you lack accountability for your choices.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:53 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • temper temper ladies-
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:55 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • I think alot of the teaching would come from years of mothering him. This is about the time sexual questions come for all teens and what you've taught them about love, life, values will all come into play now. You can tell him your honest opinion on this. Tell him the truth of it all from drugs, diseases, how those women are treated behind closed doors...but he will make his own decision.
    My husband worked at a strip club while we were separated. He says today that if he were a teacher and his classmates thought this life was cool he'd bring in a stripper and have her explain what its really like. How she has been raped by both men and women, assaults, drugs...all the stuff people don't care about when they go see the strippers take off/keep off their clothes.
    MamaChamp

    Answer by MamaChamp at 8:55 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

  • Well come on! He's 16! You'd think by now this wouldn't be an issue. He'll probably take over the family business. That's why I didn't have kids with a drug lord, I didn't want my kid thinking it was okay to do drugs...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:56 PM on Mar. 9, 2010

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